SCIFI & FANTASY QUOTES

This is space. It's sometimes called the final frontier. (Except that of course you can't have a *final* frontier, because there'd be nothing for it to be a frontier *to*, but as frontiers go, it's pretty penultimate...)
        - Terry Pratchett

"Your weapons are no match for ours! People of Mars, surrender!"
"Um, this isn't Mars. This is Earth."
"Earth? Earth-with-nuclear-weapons Earth?"
"Yes."
[long pause] "Friend!"
        - Unknown

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
        - Jack Handey, "Deep Thoughts"

I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to see more and more planets fall under the ruthless domination of our solar system.
        - Jack Handey, "Deep Thoughts"

If we get involved in a nuclear war, would the electromagnetic pulses from exploding bombs damage my videotapes?
        - Anon

For me science fiction is a way of thinking, a way of logic that bypasses a lot of nonsense. It allows people to look directly at important subjects.
        - Gene Roddenberry, creator of "Star Trek"

I've always liked the idea of a special Hugo to be awarded (by force, perhaps) to literary authors who
write books dripping with themes filleted from mainstream SF and then deny that it's science fiction
'because it's not about robots and spaceships'.
        - Terry Pratchett

More than one commentator has mentioned that science fiction as a form is where theological narrative went after Paradise Lost, and this is undoubtedly true. Supernatural creatures with wings, and burning bushes that speak, are unlikely to be encountered in a novel about stockbrokers, unless the stockbrokers have been taking a few mind-altering substances, but they are not out of place on Planet X. The form is often used as a way of acting out the consequences of a theological doctrine. The theological resonances in films such as Star Wars are more than obvious. Extraterrestrials have taken the place of angels, demons, fairies and saints, though it must be said that this last group is now making a comeback.
We want wisdom. We want hope. We want to be good. Therefore we sometimes tell ourselves warning stories that deal with the darker side of some of our other wants.
Literature is an uttering, or outering, of the human imagination. It lets the shadowy forms of thought and feeling — heaven, hell, monsters, angels and all — out into the light, where we can take a good look at them and perhaps come to a better understanding of who we are and what we want, and what the limits to those wants may be. Understanding the imagination is no longer a pastime, but a necessity; because increasingly, if we can imagine it, we'll be able to do it.
        - Margaret Atwood, "Why We Need Science Fiction", "The Guardian"

"There's no real objection to escapism, in the right places... We all want to escape occasionally. But science fiction is often very far from escapism, in fact you might say that science fiction is escape into reality... It's a fiction which does concern itself with real issues: the origin of man; our future. In fact I can't think of any form of literature which is more concerned with real issues, reality."
        - Arthur C Clarke

"Fantasy is the impossible made probable. Science fiction is the improbable made possible."
        - Rod Serling, creator of The Twilight Zone

"The reality of science is that it takes 40 years to get to Jupiter, and that's a dull show."
        - Glen Morgan, producer of sci-fi series "Space: Above and Beyond"

A planet doesn't explode of itself," said dryly The Martian Astronomer, gazing off into the air: "That they were able to do it is proof that highly Intelligent beings must have been living there."
        - John Hall Wheelcock,"Earth"

"The earth? Oh the earth will be gone in a few seconds...I'm going to blow it up. It's obstructing my view of Venus."
        - Marvin the Martian

"Your superior intellect is no match for our puny weapons."
        - Unknown...possibly The Simpsons

"I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure."
        - Ripley, "Aliens"...strangely affecting

"Peace Through Superior Firepower"
"We endanger species"
        - Mottos of the marines in "Aliens"

"If it bleeds, we can kill it."
        - Predator

"I've had people walk out on me before, but not when I was being so charming."
        - Deckard, "BladeRunner"

"The light that burns twice as bright burns half as long...and you have burned so very, very brightly, Roy."
        - Tyrell, "BladeRunner"

"I've seen things you wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die."
        - Roy Batty in "Blade Runner"

"Only when we have to fight to stay human do we realise how precious it is. How dear to us."
        - Dr Miles Bennell, "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" (1956)

"I take a dim view of watching my own destruction."
        - Jack, "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" (1956)

"The mind is a strange and wonderful thing. I'm not sure it'll ever be able to figure itself out. Everything else maybe, from the atom to the universe, everything except itself."
        - Dr Dan Kaufmann, "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" (1956)

"Where should we be if nobody tried to find out what lies beyond? Have you never wanted to look beyond the clouds and stars, to know what causes trees to bud and what changes darkness into light? But if you talk like that people call you crazy..."
        - Henry Frankenstein, "Frankenstein" (1932)

"The universe is composed of infinite planes of the random."
        - from John Wyndham's "Random Quest"

"It takes eight minutes for light to travel to the Earth from the sun... So if you wake up one morning and it's a particularly beautiful day, you'll know we made it."
        - Capa, "Sunshine"

"This is not a democracy. We are a collection of scientists and astronauts."
        - Captain Kaneda, faced with a difficult decision, "Sunshine"

"I could tell you what's happening, but I don't know if it would really tell you what's happening."
        - Snow, "Solaris"

"I'm not the person I remember."
        - Rheya, "Solaris"

"What does Solaris want from us?"
"Why do you think it has to want something? This is why you have to leave. If you keep thinking there's a solution, you'll die here... Do you understand what I'm trying to tell you? There are no answers, only choices."
        - Chris and Gibrarian, "Solaris"

"I tried to find the rhythm of the world where I used to live... But I was haunted by the idea that I remembered her wrong."
        - Chris, "Solaris"

"Death shall have no dominion...  Though lovers be lost love shall not."
        - Chris, quoting Dylan Thomas, "Solaris"

Any sort of ship you have to learn to pilot; it takes a long time, a new set of reflexes, a different and artificial way of thinking. Even riding a bicycle demands an acquired skill, very different from walking, whearas a spaceship - oh, brother! I won't live that long. Spaceships are for acrobats who are also mathematicians.
        - Juan Rico in Robert A. Heinlein's "Starship Troopers"

"Revenge and destruction are un-Christian thoughts. Also, they will not pay very well, since it is hard to sell anything to a corpse. The problem is to find some means within our resources to make it unprofitable for Borthu to raid us. Not being stupid heads, they will then stop raiding and we can maybe later do business."
        - Poul Anderson, "Margin of Profit," in Un-man and Other Novellas

"Anything you think can be held against you."
        - Phillip K. Dick, "We Can Remember It for You Wholesale"

"What is it that is exactly the same about every vacation you've  ever taken?"
"I give up."
"You. You're the same. No matter where you go, there you are. Always the same old you. Let me suggest that you take a vacation from yourself. I know it sounds wild, but it's the latest thing in travel. We call it an 'Ego Trip'."
        - Quaid and McClane, "Total Recall"

There is evil! It's actual, like cement... I can't believe it. I can't stand it. Evil is not a view... it's an ingredient in us. In the world. Poured over us, filtering into our bodies, minds, hearts, into the pavement itself.
        - Tagomi, in Philip K Dick's "The Man in the High Castle"

"It believes it is human. It wants to live. It knows fear. It will make a mistake — in the genius lies the defect."
        - Major Hathaway, "The Impostor"

"Algorithms I trust. Boolean logic I trust. Beautiful women... they just mystify me."
        - Zane Zaminski (Charlie Sheen), "The Arrival

"Right now you're just one man with a very large conspiracy theory... take great care in what you choose to find out."
        - Phil Gordion to Zane, "The Arrival"

"Have they left?"
"No."
"How do you know?"
"Because we're not dead yet."
        - Char and Zane, "The Arrival"

"You know the way I always wanted to save the planet?
(tosses empty coke can into recycle bin) Here's my chance."
        - David Levinson, "Independence Day"

"Either I'm concussed, or I'm watching Patrick Moore Moore fistfighting with an extraterrestrial."
        - An RAF pilot, in "Independence Day: UK" by Dirk Maggs

"I address you tonight not as the President of the United States, not as a leader of a country, but as a citizen of humanity. We are faced with the very gravest of challenges. The Bible calls this day 'armageddon' - the end of all things. And yet, for the first time in the history of the planet, a species has the technology to prevent its own extinction. All of you praying with us tonight need to know that everything that can be done to prevent this disaster is being called into service.
The human thirst for excellence, knowledge; every step up the ladder of science; every adventurous reach into space; all of our combined technologies and imaginations; even the wars that we've fought have provided us the tools to wage this terrible battle.
Through all of the chaos that is our history; through all of the wrong and the discord; through all of the pain and he suffering; through all of our times, there is one thing that has nourished our souls, and elevated our species above its origins, and that is our courage. The dreams of an entire planet are focused tonight on those fourteen brave sould travelling into the heavens. And may we, citizens the world over, see these events through. God speed, and good luck to you."
        - A speech from the President in "Armageddon"

"One more thing. The person who finds her gets to name her right?"
"Yes, yes that's right, that's right."
"I wanna name her Dottie after my wife. She's a vicious life-sucking bitch from which there is no escape."
        - Karl and Dan, "Armageddon"

"redruM! redruM!"
        - Danny, "The Shining"

"I think I better start studying medicine."
"Why's that?"
"Because I'm beginning to feel like Dr Watson."
        - Sheriff Truman and Agent Cooper, "Twin Peaks"

"I thought you didn't like Laura?"
"I didn't. But I understood her better than the rest."
        - Agent Cooper and Audrey Horne, "Twin Peaks"

#

Mourn not for us, for we have known the light,
Have looked on beauty, have lived in peace and love,
Grieve but for those who go alone, unwise,
To die in darkness, never having see the Sun [or is it the Son?]
        - Twilight Zone episode "The Star" based on story by Arthur C. Clarke

"It makes you wonder, doesn't it? Just how normal are we? Just who are the people we nod our hellos to as we pass on the street? A rather good question to ask — particularly in 'The Twilight Zone'."
        - Rod Serling

"Sometimes it takes a human life to balance a cold equation in the black geometry of the Twilight Zone."
        - Narration from "The Twilight Zone" episode "Cold Equations"

"In the days to come, when human beings navigate the great depths of space they'll eventually come to a small planet in a distant galaxy. It's a pleasant place, but quite unlike the Earth. There's one unusual similarity however — shamrocks grow there in great profusion."
        - Narration from "The Twilight Zone: The Little People of Kelvaney Woods"

"There's this world where the dominant lifeforms are a race of living, sentient binary digits. You could be a decimal. In time, work your way up to a fraction."
        - from "The Twilight Zone: I of Newton"

"Another of our continuing tips on what to do if the Devil shows up on your doorstep — a public service announcement from the Twilight Zone."
        - Narration from "The Twilight Zone: I of Newton"

"If we are pawns of dark powers then even our highest aspirations become a grim joke."
       - Narration from "The Twilight Zone: A Small Talent for War"

"Respectfully submitted for your perusal: a Kanamit. Height: a little over nine feet. Weight: in the neighborhood of three hundred and fifty pounds. Origin : unknown. Motives? Therein hangs the tale, for in just a moment we're going to ask you to shake hands, figuratively, with a Christopher Columbus from another galaxy and another time. This is the Twilight Zone."
        - Narration from "Twilight Zone" episode "To Serve Man"

"Wintry February night, the present. Order of events: a phone call from a frightened woman notating the arrival of an unidentified flying object, and the check-out you've just witnessed with two state troopers verifying the event, but with nothing more enlightening to add beyond evidence of some tracks leading across the highway to a diner. You've heard of trying to find a needle in a haystack? Well, stay with us now and you'll be a part of an investigating team whose mission is not to find that proverbial needle, no, their task is even harder. They've got to find a Martian in a diner, and in just a moment you'll search with them, because you've just landed in the Twilight Zone."
        - Narration from "Twilight Zone" episode "Will The Real Martian Please Stand Up?"

Had she enough of life? When she was born, few women lived past their twenties. Genevieve had so much past. How much future could she bear? Since Sputnik, many children wanted to be spacemen when they grew up. It was likely, if Earth survived the next hundred years without nuclear self-immolaton, that humanity would spread to the stars. It might be an option for her, a wonder-journey to Jupiter and beyond. She had read an article by Arthur C Clarke in Time magazine that suggested vampires like her, elderly enough to be stable, would be ideal for long-haul space flights, more resilient that the norm, long-loved enough to undertake voyages that might last human generations. There were even ways around the problem of feeding.
        - Genevieve, in "Anno Dracula 1959" by Kim Newman

"Sunlight poses a problem to our 'ethnic group'."
        - Gremlin, in "Gremlins II"

"What is wrong with you?"
"Ovinophobia, my therapist calls it."
"Well, what's that?"
"Just the completely unfounded and irrational fear that one day *this* is going to happen!"
        - Experience and Henry, facing some angry "Black Sheep"

Violence of the Lambs.
        - Tagline from "Black Sheep"

"There's that word again, 'heavy'. Why are things so heavy in the future? Is there a problem with the earth's gravitational pull?"
        - Dr Emmet Brown, "Back To The Future"

"The issue isn't whether you're paranoid, It's whether you're paranoid enough."
        - Strange Days

"People of Earth, don’t be afraid, we come in peace [ vaporises more people ] ack ack ack ack."
        - The Martians, "Mars Attacks"

"I guess it wasn't the dove."
        - Natalie Portman, "Mars Attacks"

"Why do we never meet anyone nice?"
"Why is it we never meet anyone who can shoot straight?"
        - Lister & Cat, "Red Dwarf"

"Step up to red alert."
"Sir, are you absolutely sure? It does mean changing the bulb."
        - Rimmer & Kryten, "Red Dwarf"

"How can you put your faith in a man whose idea of a romantic nightspot and an impregnable fortress are the same thing? This is a pub!"
        - David, to Liz, "Shaun of the Dead"

"Not something I ever expected to say on air... 'removing the head or destroying the brain'."
       - Jeremy Thompson, Sky News Anchor on Z-Day, "Shaun of the Dead"

"I've never watched a zombie movie without thinking: what would I do? Straight to the sports shop..."
        - Jimmy Carr, "The Panel"

"Have we anything resembling a plan?"
"Kill them all."
        -  13th Warrior, does this film have anything resembling a plot?

"You weren't alive during the Microsoft conflict. We were beating each other with our own severed limbs."
        - from Jason X

"Look, if you call me ma'am one more time I'll sue you for sexual harrassment, and with today's laws, it's possible."
        - Kelly Scott to Jack Wells, "Lake Placid"

"How did he swim across the sea?"
"They conceal information like that in books."
        - Sheriff Hank Keough and Hector Cyr, "Lake Placid"

"OK. I admit it. It's a crocodile... but maybe now somebody's happy I brought my big gun?"
        - Sheriff Hank Keough, "Lake Placid"

"Carpe diem is what happened to me!"
        - Rembrandt Brown, "Sliders"

"I've been sliding through an interdimensional wormhole seeing how many ways people like you can screw up civilization!"
        - Quinn Mallory, "Sliders"

"I don't deserve to live for what I've done, but I'm a coward!"
        - The Judge, trying to flee his fate, "The Day the World Ended"

"If the road to hell is paved with good intentions you'll find your way very quickly."
        - Col. Andrew Brynner to Dr. Richard Long, "Chill Factor"

"I want an explanation!"
"Explanation won't help you."
        - Detectives Tom Beck and Lloyd Gallagher, "The Hidden"

"I tried a Mandarian virus once. Chinese people could understand what I was saying, but I couldn't."
        - Maria, "Code 46"

"Everybody's kids are so special these days, makes you wonder where all the ordinary grownups come from."
        - Maria, "Code 46"

"Tell me something about yourself."
"Anything?"
"Well, try to make it interesting. I've got a long day ahead of me."
        - William, working his way through the suspects, "Code 46"

"I've got a headache."
"Bad?"
"Yeah, pretty bad."
"Well why didn't you say something before?"
"Cos I didn't think you'd give a shit."
        - Jim & Selena, on the run, "28 Days Later"

"Girls, I told you. No more deaths in the house!"
"It's for extra credit."
        - Pamela and Ginger Fitzgerald, "Ginger Snaps"

"A girl can only be a slut, bitch, tease, or the virgin next door."
        - Ginger, "Ginger Snaps"

"64% of prom dates end in sex."
"You just made that up!"
        - June, trying to scare Freya straight, "Thoughtcrimes"

"Scoody-dooby-doo..."
        - Brendan's internal soundtrack, "Thoughtcrimes"

"You got nothing little girl, only answers you were supposed to find."
        - A suspect taunts Freya, "Thoughtcrimes"

"Your blood shall make me even more beautiful. What do you think of that?"
"I think if you're going to kill somebody, kill them, don't stand around talking about it."
        - Aleera and Anna, in mid-stake, "Van Helsing"

"Why do you torment him so?"
"That's what I do."
        - Count Dracula and Igor, as Igor cattleprods a werewolf, "Van Helsing"

"That's why you're coming with me."
"The hell be damned that I am."
"You cursed. Not very well, mind you, but you're a monk. You shouldn't curse at all."
"...I'm not a field man! Van Helsing, I don't want to go to Transylvania!"
        - Van Helsing and Carl, "Van Helsing"

"Why are you helping me?"
"I'm not. I'm helping me."
        - Selene & Erika, "Underworld"

"Lycans are allergic to silver. We have to get the bullets out quickly, or they end up dying on us during questioning."
"What happens to them afterward?"
"We put the bullets back in."
        - Selene & Michael, "Underworld"

Being a simple, old-fashioned fellow, I like my vampires staked through the heart and my werewolves bludgeoned to death with silver-handled walking sticks. So, I had a tough time processing "Underworld", in which vampires wielding automatic weapons do Matrix-style slow-motion somersaults while firing silver-nitrate bullets into werewolves, who ricochet off the walls while shooting back with irradiated "daylight" projectiles. Some of the werewolves (or, as they're known here, "Lycans") are able to squeeze the bullets out of their smoking bodies in mid-transformation, while others simply keel over and rot... Literalist that I am, I kept wanting to scream: "!?!WHAT ARE THE BLOODY RULES!?!"
        - David Edelstein, bothered and bewildered reviewing "Underworld" for "MSN Slate"

"Lost" is at heart a science-fiction thriller, while "Heroes" is more of a comic book, but both genres have a similar appeal: they provide an alternative society for those who don’t fit comfortably into their own. (That is to say, smart, socially awkward adults and all 12-year-old boys.) No matter how far-fetched and complicated that imaginary world may be, it is bound by its own intricate set of rules and customs, be it Quidditch regulations at Hogwarts; etiquette on Superman’s native planet, Krypton; or military rank in "Battlestar Galactica."
The fans of these kinds of serialized thrillers are unusually passionate and devoted, carrying a clout not unlike that of anti-abortion activists — their intensity is in some ways more powerful than their numbers. The writers of “Lost” say they pay close attention to Web sites and blogs devoted to the show, and sometimes adapt the script accordingly.
        - Alessandra Stanley, "New York Times"

There must be a rational explanation for all the supernatural phenomena on television. There must. Because it is weird, and even a little freaky, that so many shows this season prey on the paranormal. Vampires have day jobs as detectives, store clerks reap souls for the Devil, reporters time-travel to get their stories straight, cheerleaders walk through fire and people of all kinds talk to dead people, sometimes quite chattily.
        - Alessandra Stanley, "New York Times"

In recent years, "science fiction" has become synonymous with titles like Star Wars, Star Trek, and Battlestar Galactica. And, while there's nothing wrong with these movies and TV shows (in fact, they're predominately entertaining), they should be accurately be referred to as "space operas" or "futuristic fantasies." Die-hard science fiction buffs have long bemoaned the absence of real "science" in "science fiction." Then, every once in a long while, along comes something like Sunshine that tries to take a step back toward reality. Among Sunshine's credits is a science consultant, and the filmmakers made every effort to follow his suggestions. The result is that, while Sunshine may not feature space battles and ships zipping around at warp speed, it provides a window into what it might really be like traveling around in the solar system in another half-century...  One doesn't need a black-hatted villain to generate excitement. As in Apollo 13, the challenges of staying alive and on course are sufficient.
        - James Berardinelli, from his online review of "Sunshine"

For these past 30 years, anyone wanting to keep up with popular cinema, and those who have professionally to explain what they have seen, have had to master the geography, inhabitants, characters, genealogy, jargon, technology and vocabulary of a succession of imaginary worlds. First there was that distant galaxy long long ago in Star Wars and its successors, then the Middle-earth of The Lord of the Rings, which overlapped with the still evolving Harry Potter saga, before the arrival of the Narnia cycle, of which there is more to come. Now we have The Golden Compass, the first part of Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials trilogy, set in a parallel universe much like our own and compelling us to come to terms with another strange glossary.
        - Philip French, "The Observer"

They're a real nuisance, these skin-walkers: supernatural monsters who kill people, then steal, and wear, their skin. Because they look exactly like the person whose skin they're wearing, you don't know who's a skin-walker and who isn't. I hate that about skin-walkers.
        - Sam Wollaston, reviewing supernatural detective series, "The Dresden Files", "The Guardian"

Interspecies mating is always a challenge, particularly when one species (werewolves) likes to eat the other (vampires).
        - Jeannette Catsoulis, reviewing supernatural romance "Blood and Chocolates", "NY Times"

"You're only 90. You've never been chased by a torch-carrying mob."
        - Josef, 500 year old vampire, putting Mick in his place, "Moonlight"

Vampires with a conscience are like cheerleaders in habits: what precisely is the point?...In almost every way, "Moonlight" demands that we question the grounds for its existence.
        - Ginia Bellafante, "NY Times"

"This must be the longest Santa death scene in the history of Santa slasher movies."
        - Colin Murphy, commenting on "Santa F*cks Up", "The Blizzard of Odd"

"What happens if they board us?"
"If they take the ship they will rape us to death, eat our flesh, and sew our skins in to their clothing, and if we're very, very lucky, they’ll do it in that order."
        - Simon and Zoe, "Firefly"

"You know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I go get and beat you with until you understand who's in ruttin' command here."
        - Jayne, "Firefly"

"Seems odd you'd name your ship after a battle you were on the wrong side of."
"May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."
        - Harken and Mal, "Firefly"

"I like to worry about things from all angles."
        - Lukas, "Threshold"

"I would like to thank you all for helping us to make sense of this world, and when it didn't make sense, for teaching us to lie back and enjoy it. For showing us what was true, real and beautiful about this world."
        - Dick's farewell speech, "Third Rock from the Sun"

Powers, Principalities, Thrones & Dominions.
       - Episode Title, "Millenium"

"Oh Benson, dear Benson, you are so mercifully free of the ravages of intelligence."
        - Evil Genius, "Time Bandits"

"I have only one human weakness. I can't bear to see other people lousing things up."
        - Professor Quentin E. Deverill, "Q.E.D. aka The Mastermind"

"Time and tide and buttered eggs wait for no man."
        - Cole Hawlings, "The Box of Delights"

"The terror and power of the Box is though it allows you enter the past you may not take the Box with you. You enter at your own risk and you must find your own way out."
        - Abner Brown, "The Box of Delights"

Imagine if aliens — you know, like the ones from "Taken," which we don't think has ended yet — plopped down on a couch somewhere in the Haight and watched "Survivor" and found Brian acting like he was the world's most savvy and intelligent strategist? We can imagine them drunk on Mickey's Big Mouth, depressed that they delayed their plans for invasion for so long. "This is all they've got? This Brian guy?"
        - Tim Goodman, "San Francisco Chronicle"

"Would someone please explain to me why the triumph of Evil is always accompanied by ugly, skimpy and non-functional clothing, an exponential increase in power, and a total failure of intellect?"
        - Dani Zweig

"There's my nipple."
"We orginally wanted to show both your nipples, but we want to show that we had a bit of class."
        - Milla Jovovich and Paul Anderson, "Resident Evil" DVD Audio Commentary

"Amazing! Here among the nerds, I've found an actual girl here. Not bad odds, eh honey? You've got your veritable pick of the litter, from all these guys who have no idea how to please you."
"Who wants a spoiler? I've got a spoiler! You will die alone!"
"And now we see the ceremonial banging of the plastic toys..."
"Trivia time! What substance was Han Solo frozen in? Carbonite? No, I'm sorry. The correct answer is: Who gives a @#$^."
        - Triumph The Insult Dog takes on Star Wars fans at the Phantom Menace premiere

"Oh boy, the Shatner's really hit the fan now. I'm up Dawson's Creek without a paddle."
        - Space Ghost, "Space Ghost Coast to Coast"

"In my land, women are for advancing the race, not for fighting man's battles."
        - Eros, "Plan 9 from Outer Space"

>> Quotes from specific series and films has been moved to a new page

>> Harry Potter quotes have been moved to a dedicated page.

>> Stargate quotes have also been moved to a dedicated page.

# FANTASY

Horror writers are reactionaries in general simply because they are particularly, one might even say professionally, aware of the existence of Evil.
        - Michel Houellebecq, "HP Lovecraft: Against the World, Against Life"

"I have fought my way to the castle beyond the Goblin City, to take back the child that you have stolen. For my will is as strong and my kingdom is great... For my will is as strong and my kindgom is great... damn! I can never remember that line."
        - Jennifer Connelly, "Labyrinth"

"My secrets guard themselves. Will yours do the same?"
        - Haggard, "The Last Unicorn"

"Spite the unicorn and drown thyself."
"That saying was made by a unicorn for the jest of watching folk obey it..."
        - Matthew and Fence in Pamela C. Dean's "The Whim of the Dragon"

"Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards,"
"Cut it out. We are the affairs of wizards."
"What a very uncomfortable thought."
       - Ruth and Ted in Pamela C. Dean's "The Whim of the Dragon"

"You don't respect those people very much, because you're young and arrogant. But I don't respect them very much either, because I'm old and wise."
        - Neal Stephenson, "Snow Crash"

"Not bad, but you've got to learn to relax. An insult's got a certain rhythm and flow to it that you haven't quite picked up yet."
        - Beldin, in David Eddings's "The Belgariad"

"There aren't any good Plan B's, Tim. If they were any good they'd be Plan A's!"
        - Wanda in "The Magic School Bus"

"One does not judge the gazelle by the lions that attack it."
       - Tarzan, in "The Return of Tarzan" by Edgar Rice Burroughs

"This is the story of my life, or rather, that part of it that seems to me to be important."
        - Gideon Prosper, "The Tempest"

"Gail? Rinaldo's girlfriend? My Son was dating a demon?"
"Let's not be prejudiced. He'd done a lot worse his freshman year."
"You've got a point there," she admitted. "I'd forgotten Carol."
        - Roger Zelazny, "Knight of Shadows"

"To great minds"
"Pure hearts"
"Hard bodies."
        - the Gang raise a toast on "Relic Hunter"

"You mistook the Queen of Iceland for a Saxon?"
        - an easy mistake to make in "Ring of the Nibelungs"

"Heathens to the left of me, infidels to the right. Next thing you'll be telling me is you're not virgins!"
        - Leah, to Xena and Gabrielle, "Xena: Warrior Princess"

"I still think you'd make a great virgin."
        - Leah to Gabrielle, "Xena: Warrior Princess"

There are vocal qualities peculiar to men, and vocal qualities peculiar to beasts; and it is terrible to hear the one when the source should yield the other.
        - HP Lovecraft, "The Call of Cthulhu"

"Did you ever notice how in the Bible, when ever God needed to punish someone, or make an example, or whenever God needed a killing, he sent an angel? Did you ever wonder what a creature like that must be like? A whole existence spent praising your God, but always with one wing dipped in blood. Would you ever really want to see an angel?"
        - Thomas to Catherine, "The Prophecy"

"Why?"
"I'm an angel. I kill firstborns while their mommas watch. I turn cities into salt... And, from now until kingdom come, the only thing you can count on in your existence is never understanding why."
        - Catherine and Gabriel

"Nice Catholic boy like you Mr Daggett, you should be on my side."
        - Gabriel to Thomas

"I have my soul. And I have my faith. What do you have angel?"
        - Thomas to Gabriel

"This new heaven will be another hell... and two hells is one hell too many."
        - Lucifer, with an offer to Catherine

"This war is mine!"
"This war is arrogance! And that makes it mine."
        - Gabriel and Lucifer, "The Prophecy"

This is a work of fiction. All the characters in it, human and otherwise, are imaginary, excepting only certain of the fairy folk, whom it might be unwise to offend by casting doubts on their existence. Or lack thereof.
        - Neil Gaiman, The Books of Magic III

"Going somewhere local?"
        - Edward, "The League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse"

"But you're not real!"
"We are now."
        - Jeremy Dyson and Papa Lazarou, "The League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse"

"We are three of the more bizarre characters... it's time for a more subtle approach."
        - Edward, tracking down his creator in "The League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse"

"You are the very devil sir!"
"Not quite... but his methods are mine."
        - Dr Erasmus Pea, "The League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse"

"I have no quarrel with you my brothers in fiction. Hand over the creators and there need be more more bloodshed."
        - Dr Erasmus Pea, "The League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse"

"News just in... the Underground system is to renamed the Underworld system and will be used exclusively to ferry the dead to the Valley of the Last Judgment."
        - from "The Nine Lives of Tomas Katz"

"Dave, it has come to my attention that you are the most vacuous being in the universe."
        - Tomas Katz, "The Nine Lives of Tomas Katz"

"The decimal system is the numerology of the Devil. Transect your mind to binary... prepare to face zero!"
        - from "The Nine Lives of Tomas Katz"

A philosopher once asked, "Are we human because we gaze at the stars, or do we gaze at them because we are human?" Pointless, really... "Do the stars gaze back?" Now *that's* a question.
        - The Narrator, "Stardust"

"You know when I said I knew little about love? That wasn't true. I know a lot about love. I've seen it, centuries and centuries of it, and it was the only thing that made watching your world bearable. All those wars. Pain, lies, hate... It made me want to turn away and never look down again. But when I see the way that mankind loves... You could search to the furthest reaches of the universe and never find anything more beautiful. So yes, I know that love is unconditional. But I also know that it can be unpredictable, unexpected, uncontrollable, unbearable and strangely easy to mistake for loathing, and... What I'm trying to say, Tristan is... I think I love you. Is this love, Tristan? I never imagined I'd know it for myself. My heart... It feels like my chest can barely contain it. Like it's trying to escape because it doesn't belong to me any more. It belongs to you. And if you wanted it, I'd wish for nothing in exchange - no gifts. No goods. No demonstrations of devotion. Nothing but knowing you loved me too. Just your heart, in exchange for mine."
        - Yvaine, "Stardust"

"I was wondering why you didn't go looking for Skarpi?"
Kvothe drew a deep breath and sighed. "The simplest reason is the least satisfying one, I suppose. The truth is this: I wasn't living in a story."
"I don't think I'm understanding you, Reshi," said Bast.
"Think of all the stories you've heard, Bast. You have a young boy, the hero. His parents are killed. He sets out for vengeance. What happens next?" Bast hesitated, his expression puzzled. Chronicler answered the question instead. "He finds help. A clever talking squirrel. An old drunken swordsman. A mad hermit in the woods. That sort of thing ... he finds the villains and kills them." Kvothe leaned forward. "If this were some tavern tale, all half-truth and senseless adventure ... but whilst that might make for an entertaining story, it would not be the truth."
        - from "The Name of the Wind" by Patrick Rothfuss

"I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand, walking through the streets of Soho in the rain.
He was looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook's, going to get himself a big dish of beef chow mein.
If you hear him howling around your kitchen door better not let him in."
        - Warren Zevon, singing of "The Werewolves of London"

# FROM 'STRANGER THINGS HAPPEN' by KELLY LINK

"I like the idea of taking things that are alien and making them seem really very cozy and familiar. That’s something that science fiction can do. It’s the way that people can look at pictures of flying saucers and say that looks like a saucer, from under a teacup, something small and domestic. On the other hand, what I like about more realistic fiction, writers like Lorrie Moore, for example, is the way it looks at familiar things and makes them seem so strange."
        - Kelly Link, interviewed by Salon

Listen, because I'm only going to do this once. You'll have to get there by way of London. Take the overnight train from Waverly. Sit in the last car. Speak to no one. Don't fall asleep.
When you arrive at Kings Cross, go down into the Underground. Get on the Northern line. Sit in the last car. Speak to no one. Don't fall asleep.
The Northern line stops at Angel, at London Bridge, at Elephant and Castle, Tooting Broadway. The last marked station is Morden: stay in your seat. Other passengers will remain with you in the car. Speak to no one.
These are some of the unlisted stations you will pass: Howling Green. Duke's Pit. Sparrowkill. Stay in your seat. Don't fall asleep.
If you look around the car, you may notice that the other passengers have started to glow. The bulbs on the car dim as the passengers give off more and more light. If you look down you may find that you yourself are casting light into the dark car. The final stop is Bonehouse.
        - Instructions and Advice for Going to Hell, from "Flying Lessons"

She began to notice the way that birds watched from telephone lines as she walked past them. She counted them, trying to remember how they added up for joy, how for sorrow.
        - from "Flying Lessons"

"I'm dreaming," June said.
"It would be a mistake to believe that," said Rose Read. "An utter failure of the imagination."
        - from "Flying Lessons"

You may very well ask what the goddess of love is doing in St. Andrews, writing trashy romances. Adapting.
        - from "Flying Lessons"

A girl from Pittsburgh was a good thing, like an anchor. Every homesick traveler should have one.
        - An American abroad, from "Survivor's Ball"

There were tall drifts of snow on either side of the road. Every 500 meters they passed black-and-yellow signs reading: "Danger! Avalanche Area: Do Not Stop Vehicle!" Every sign said exactly the same thing, but Serena read them out loud anyway, in different voices — Elmer Fudd, Humphrey Bogart, the barman's flirty New Zealand sing-song. "Danger, Will Robinson Crusoe!" she said, "Killer robots and tsunamis from Mars ahead. Also German tourists. Do not stop your vehicle. Do not roll down your window to feed the lions. Remain inside your vehicle at all times. Do not pass go. Do not pick up hitchhikers — oops, too late."
        - On the road, from "Survivor's Ball"

What happens when you get to the end of the world? Sometimes you find a party. This party has been going on for a long time. There is music, lights, people drinking and dancing. Strange things happen at these parties. It is the end of the world, after all.
        - from "Survivor's Ball"

"Some of us have come from very far away," Mr. Donner said. "We meet every year. We meet to celebrate the triumph of the human spirit in situations of great adversity. We are all travelers, survivors of adventures, calamitous expeditions, of tragedies. We are widows and orphans, the survivors of marriages and shipwrecks. This is the 143rd Survivor's Ball."
        - from "Survivor's Ball"

"Have the two of you been traveling together long?" Mr. Donner asked.
"Oh no," Serena said. "We met three days ago in a bar in Queenstown. We're traveling around the world in opposite directions. I fly to Hawaii next Tuesday and then I'm supposed to go home again. This is just Jasper's second stop."
        - from "Survivor's Ball"

"Jasper isn't the sort who travels purposefully," she said to Mr. Donner. "He isn't the sort who's purposeful, or smart, or careful about the kinds of women in bars he picks up in bars, for that matter. You've got to be careful," she said, turning to Jasper for a moment, "about picking up girls in bars, good grief, what if I'd turned out to be weird, or something? But he isn't careful. He's lucky instead."
        - from "Survivor's Ball"

"Sometimes people do unthinkable things, in order to come home safely," Mr. Donner said. "Impossible things, wonderful things. And afterwards, do you think they go home? No. You find it's much, much better to keep on travelling. Hard to stop, really."
        - from "Survivor's Ball"

The bearded man was practically gnashing his teeth, smiling ferociously. "I have seen snow and I have been hungry, and I have seen nothing in my travels that is so bad as not living. I propose a toast, Mr. Todd."
They both raised their glasses. "To travel," one said.
"To life," said the other.
        - from "Survivor's Ball"

"The girl detective looked at her reflection in the mirror. This was a different girl. This was a girl who would chew gum."
        - Dora Knez in "The Girl Detective"

Some people say that she is not one girl but many — that is, she's actually a secret society of Girl Scouts. Or possibly a sub-branch of the FBI. Whom does the girl detective love?
Remember that boy, Fred, or Nat? Something like that. He was in love with the girl detective, even though she was smarter than him, even though he never got to rescue her even once from the bad guys, or when he did, she was really just letting him, to be kind. He was a nice boy with a good sense of humor, but he used to have this recurring dream in which he was a golden retriever. The girl detective knew this, of course, the way she knows all our dreams. How could she settle down with a boy who dreamed that he was a retriever?
        - from "The Girl Detective"

>> Read the ebook of Stranger Things Happen

# TV FANTASY

"Trust me."
"You know, coming from you, those are the two scariest words in the English language."
        - Blair and Jim, "The Sentinel"

"Sure Salem had dreams, maybe they were bereft of ethics, or even a plan, but at least they were dreams."
        - Juliette, "Sabrina the Teenage Witch"

"We should hang out more often, and not just when one of our lives is in danger."
        - Sabrina, bonding with Amanda, "Sabrina the Teenage Witch"

"If you had to fall in love with someone who is evil, I can see why it was her."
        - Marshall to Vaughn on "Alias"

"I found out that she used to be a dude."
"I heard that you used to be too."
        - Sock and Josie, explaining why they broke up, "Reaper"

"My parents sold my soul to the Devil."
"How drunk are you?"
"Totally sober."
"How drunk am I?"
        - Sam and Sock, "Reaper"

"She's not the woman *of* my dreams, she's the woman *in* my dreams. Look she knew my name without me telling her!"
        - Jeremy to Ralph, in a strange situation, "My Best Friend is a Vampire"

"Get to the point!"
"In a nutshell, you're alive but you're not alive. You're dead but you're not dead. Ever hear the word undead? How about this one: vampire? I hope you're heard that one because that's what you are, ok? I wanted to break it to you nice and easy but no... Everything with you young people has to be fast, fast, fast."
        - Modoc fills in Jeremy, "My Best Friend is a Vampire"

Evil Guest Immortal: I have you now, MacLeod! clang clang
Duncan MacLeod: I admit it. You're better than I am. clang clang
EGI: Then why are you smiling? clang clang
DML: Because I know something you don't know... ...I am the star of this show! clang, slash, whap, thud, cool FX
        - Highlander: the TV series (general plot synopsis)

Lois Lane, independent career-woman of the 1990's, you're about to be stranded in 1866 without the right to vote, own property, or write for a great metropolitan newspaper. God, I love irony!
        - Tempus, "New Adventures Of Superman"

Lois, did you know that in the future, you're revered at the same level as Superman? Why, there are books about you, statues, an interactive game. You're even a breakfast cereal. [...] But as much as everybody loves you, there is one question that keeps coming up? "How DUMB was she?" Here, I'll show you what I mean. Look: (glasses on) I'm Clark Kent! (glasses off) No, wait, I'm Superman! (glasses on) Mild mannered reporter! (glasses off) Super-hero!... Hello! Duh! Clark Kent is Superman! Well, that was worth the whole trip, to actually meet the most galactically stupid woman to ever live.
        - Tempus, "New Adventures Of Superman"

"Superman, as long as I have you here, just answer one thing for me: Why tights? Why a cape? You're a grown man. Don't you feel ridiculous?"
"My mother made it for me."
        - Tempus & Superman, "New Adventures Of Superman"

"There was a bomb! He — he ate it!"
        - Lois, meeting Superman for the first time, "New Adventures of Superman"

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