Damnit! I'm missing The McNeil-Bacon Hour!
Subject: The Summer 1996 Lineup for Stoopid TV
Date: Sun, 31 Mar 1996 00:40:42 GMT
From: fts@cris.com (Chester Karma)
Reply-To: fts@cris.com
Organization: FtS / iLP Productions
Newsgroups: alt.stupidity
By now, I'm sure you've all watched numerous hours of Stoopid TV ...
available on most cable systems as channel 1, others as channel 3.14, and
others still as channel n. Satellite viewers can find Stoopid TV by
pointing their dish to satellite "Moron IC", channel 10.
Guota-filled and all new, it's....
Starting sometime soon, the Summer 1996 Lineup is as follows:
MONDAY:
8:00p - "Hey, it's Monday at 8!" - Hosted by George Wendt.
8:30p - "This Old Froup" - Hosted by Bob Vila
9:30p - "Longest Thread Ever--The TV Show"
10:30p - "Play-A-Day" - By Mr. Play-A-Day
11:00p - Local News (or low-fat equivalent)
TUESDAY:
8:00p - "Hey! It's Tuesday at 8!" - Hosted by George Wendt
8:30p - "The McNeil-Bacon Hour" - Hosted by Spatch
9:30p - "5TUP1DZ"
10:00p - "Dihydrogen Monoxide" - Hosted by Bill Gates
11:00p - Local News (high in fiber)
WEDNESDAY:
8:00p - "Hey, it's Wednesday at 8!" - hosted by George Wendt
8:30p - "The Hour Made Just to Piss the FCC Off"
9:30p - Stupid Sports Coverage: Covering such sports as
Pinless Bowling, One Team Soccer, Baseless Baseball,
Winter Golfing, and Cricket
11:00p - Local News (nothing witty to say here)
THURSDAY:
8:00p - "Hey, it's Thursday at 8!" - hosted by George Wendt
8:30p - "Uses for AOL Disks" - Hosted by Steve Case
9:30p - "Molecular Biology Made Easy"
11:00p - Local News (with optional airbags)
FRIDAY:
8:00p - "Hey, it's Friday at 8!" - hosted by George Wendt
8:30p - "The Stupid Bunch"
9:00p - "America's Most Stupid"
9:30p - "The S-Files" - featuring FBI Agents Nosy and Flapjack.
10:00p - "Real Stories of the Stupid Patrol"
11:00p - Local News (fortified with vitamins and minerals)
SATURDAY:
8:00p - "Hey, it's Saturday at 8!" - hosted by George Wendt
8:30p - "Absolutely Spatulous" - hosted by Spatch
9:00p - "POP!" - hosted by Bill's clones
10:00p - "The hour we couldn't think of anything to fill with"
11:00p - Local News (in vibrant technicolor!)
SUNDAY:
8:00p - "George Wendt Kills Postal Workers" - hosted by _amp
8:30p - "Commandante Matt Meow Meow Bruce Hour"
9:30p - "The Abe Smith Show"
10:30p - "Songs About Masturbation"
11:00p - Local News (followed by test pattern... of Spatch's nose-cam)
---
"Backing out of his driveway, Mr. Peabody suddenly brought his car to a
stop. He had already heard a peculiar 'thump', and now those flattened
but familiar looking glasses intrigued him..."
Chester Karma ... fts@cris.com ... http://www.cris.com/~fts