Does not tolerate fools gladly
Has a foul temper
Roguish sense of humour
Psychopathic practical joker
Lives life to the full
Is usually drunk
Lives life to the full but always has time for the family
Is usually drunk and then rows with the wife
Never forgets his origins
Maintains his regional accent
Well rounded human being
Plays golf at least five times per week
Voice of reason, arbitrator and moderator
Indecisive, sycophantic creep
Wide range of interests
Lecherous
Loved by his staff
Adulterous lecher
Has time for colleagues and friends
Has no work to do and they help him home from the pub
Regarded as an enigma
Regarded as totally insane
Familiar figure to all departments
So absent minded he has to ask to find his way back to his own office
Reputation as something of a wit
Exhibits a psychopathic cackle when telling a joke
Despite his many commitments
Has an excessive list of pubs that are open all hours
Displays a characteristic, youthful enthusiasm
Has fits of uncontrollable rage if not able to watch his favourite cartoons on TV
Will be sorely missed by colleagues
Owes considerable sums to the coffee, Christmas and birthday pools
If you have comments or suggestions, e-mail me at ciaran@mindless.com