25th May, 2000
Notice
Board
TWO WRONGS DON'T MAKE A WHITE
by Darragh McManus
With depressing
predictability, racist "slogans" and abuse have begun
to appear on strategic garage walls and street comers in this
fair land of a thousand (qualified) welcomes. Oh! God. Of course
they have. It makes perfect sense. The ones responsible for this
are people. People are stupid. Hence, they are writing stupid
things, QED. How could it be any other way? The other
unsurprising aspect of the whole sad affair is the utter lack of
any imagination or originality. The submorons have obviously
decided to stick with the tried and tested: old favourites like
"white power" or the charming "nigger's out"
(don't they teach any punctuation in school anymore?), bookended
with one or two stylish and eye-catching swastikas. "Well,
you know, we wanted an image that people could identify with.
Something familiar and well known. I mean, our product has been
around for a very long time, and we wanted to convey to people
our long-established traditions and commitment to excellence. So
we chose the recurring swastika motif along with a catchy slogan
in white spray-paint."
Surely there is some scope for improvement here. How about "I
have no job so I'm going to take it out on the foreigners who I
imagine have taken it"? No? Okay, then "What else is
there to do on a Friday night?" Or maybe "Racism brings
meaning to my life". This could actually be the root cause
of all this trouble. Since the chaotic 90's, where the parameters
of meaning have been shifted so far that they've become invisible,
dressing up in a pointy hat and bonding with your fellow Teutons
may be the only way to bring order and a sense of purpose. I am a
bigot, therefore I am.
The funniest thing (and not in a ha ha kind of way) of all is
that it's happening in Ireland. Forget the fact that there are
millions of Irish immigrants scattered all over the place, or the
pride we take in the cordial welcomes we extend to tourists and
multinationals hungry for a tax-break. Forget even the fact that
we are not Aryan supermen, and are not seen as such by... well,
other Aryan supermen (I'm pretty sure Hitler lumped the Celts in
the same evolutionary pile as the Ape-People of the Andes and
homosexual communist).
No, we can delude ourselves and be hypocritical up to a point.
But only a point. History doesn't lie, and facts don't either (except
sometimes, when they do). And the fact remains that Ireland was
colonised for over 700 years. That has to be some kind of world
record. Before Europe decimated Africa, before Columbus "claimed"
the Americas for the Queen of Spain, before the Renaissance,
Reformation, invention of the printing press, Bubonic plague and
the writing of Greensleeves, Ireland was under the authority of
another people. Ireland was a colony before the term was even
coined. "Okay, so we've got baronies, fiefdoms, counties and
realms. But what the bloody hell do we call this Yrelande?"
We are the world champions of being taken over and the Nobel
laureates in getting our asses kicked. So maybe the next time the
Irish Nazi Association are about to distribute leaflets arguing
that "blacks are the scum of the British Empire",
someone should take them aside and point out that, in fact, we
are the scum of the British Empire - we spent longer under the
cosh than all the blacks and Asians we now blame for our
unemployment, confusion, lack of self-esteem, or whatever. Or
maybe that person could point out that neither of us are "scum":
that we were both victims of white greed and self-aggrandisement;
that perhaps we should empathise with our fellow colonised
instead of victimising them again; that two wrongs don't make a
happy white.
REFLEXOLOGY EXPLAINED
What is Reflexology?
Reflexology is gentle pressure of the thumb over every part of
the foot. It works on the principle that there are points on the
foot that correspond to each and every structure and organ in the
body so it is possible to pinpoint areas of the body that are not
functioning to their full capacity, or have been affected by
previous illnesses. Working these areas of the feet has been
found to release blockages in the flow of energy present along
the Reflexology zones in a person's body thus restoring the
normal balance and allowing the body to heal itself.
What and where are these Zones?
Various Eastern Medical beliefs systemised the body into zones
and meridians. Reflexology deals only with the longitudinal zones.
There are 10 zones, five in each foot, which run horizontally up
the body from the toes to the top of the head with the dividing
line running between each toe. Energy flows along these lines and
any disruption of the energy flow affects the organs and
structures along the length of these zones.
Can Reflexology help me if I am already attending a doctor for a
diagnosed condition?
All illnesses are caused by imbalances of some kind in the
tissues of the body. Some of these are caused by bacteria/viruses.
others by damage or injury to tissues. Chemical failure is caused
by under, over or non-product ion of essential minerals/hormones
necessary for normal body functions. This causes major stress in
the body as it tries to heal itself. Reflexology helps combat
stress and promotes healing by unblocking the disrupted energy
flow along the zones. It does not interfere with the action of
drugs such as antibiotics, anti
inflammatory agents painkillers etc. However there are certain
conditions where Reflexology is not recommended. These are (a)
Diabetes, (b) Anyone on major steroid medications. Those in the
first trimester of Pregnancy. (d) Anyone with broken skin or
infections of the foot including Athlete's foot.
From Marian Gray@ 087 6540696 - More next week
IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME
by Declan Cronin of Apex Clinic
Question: For the last nine months I've had pains in my abdomen.
The pain can vary in intensity from severe to a slight kind of
niggling discomfort. At times I can have pains in my shoulders
similar to that of the flu and then again on other occasions I
experience sever pain in the lower part of my back. When I'm in
sever pain I sometimes feel nauseous and feel as if I'm about to
faint. When I get an attack of this magnitude I find that the
only thing I can do is to take to my bed until it has passed.
These sever bouts of pain can last for anything up to five hours.
I would like to know if you think that I might have Irritable
Bowel Syndrome and could you advise me on what I should do. I'm
twenty years of age and because of this I've had to give up my
job.
Answer: From your letter it seems that you have not been
diagnosed with having Irritable Bowel Syndrome by a medical
doctor. and so the first thing you should do is contact your
doctor and explain exactly what you've told me. Abdominal pain
seems to be the most commonly reported symptom of Irritable Bowel
Syndrome and is probably the main reason why people seek help.
Reports and studies suggest that a slight majority of lBS
sufferers can be in pain for three or four hours a day, and at
times this could last form anything up to a month. You also state
that you have given up your job. This can be common among suffers
and in fact there are thousands of hours lost
each year in employment as a direct result of IBS. Within the
next few months I'll be conducting a controlled pilot study of
the positive effects psychotherapy can have on people who suffer
from IBS. The costs of this study will be totally absorbed by the
Apex clinic. If you wish to partake in this study you should
contact me as soon as possible as there are only a few places
left. You will need a letter from your doctor stating that you
have been diagnosed with having Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
More next week.
ON THE ROUNDABOUT
Cllr. Deirdre Clune,T.D has called on the Minister for Enterprise, Trade and Employment to investigate the prices of Nintendo Products………Marriage of Convenience, a play by Ian Rowlands, described as "a marriage between a language and a region that had long since forgotten the sound of it's own past." can be seen at the Granary Theatre from Monday 29th May…. Popular ballad singer Jim McCann has released a new album called 'By Request'….the crew of naval vessel the LE Roisin has ' adopted' the Children's Unit at Cork University Hospital…..there's an open meeting at the Douglas Library on Thursday 8th of June from 6.00pm to 8.00pm for all those interested injoining the Open University……the Edith Wilkins Hope Foundation are holding a Gala Concert in Maryborough House Hotel on Wednesday 31st of May at 8.00pm tickets are available from Falveys or at the door.
BEAN FED THE BIRD
A couple of weeks back 'Wusslife' stormed into the charts and
brushed aside all in their path. The group was the brainchild of
Louis Walsh and is managed by Ronan Teeting. Their new album is
to be entitled, ''A fart in a fog'' and contains the No.1 smash-hit,
''baby the toast is burnt and I need some mind candy''. Two
singles will be released from the album in early May, the
eloquent, '' will it bleed if I pick it?'', and not forgetting
the beautiful ballad, ''Who's taking the horse to France?'' The
name of the album is reportedly inspired by the singing voice of
Ronan Teeting, and some of the singing fraternity in Douglas G.A.A!!
I could name them…..but I won't for fear of retribution.
It must be said that the amenities for children in Douglas
Community Park, is now the envy of the city and beyond. I pass it
daily and it's a paradise for the kids, and with the summer
coming in it will again live up to its full potential. One thing
kids love, is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my
niece to McDonald's but instead I drove her to an old burnt -out
warehouse. ''Oh no,'' I said. ''McDonald's burnt down''. She
cried and cried, but I think deep down, she thought it was a
pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real McDonald's
but it was getting pretty late - so I didn't bother.
It's also great to see that the trees don't seem to have been
vandalised in the Community Park recently. I wonder, if trees
could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down?
Hmmn…. We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good
reason.
The circus was in town again recently and I swore I'd go, but I
never did. To me clowns aren't funny. In fact they're kind of
scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back
to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad. Dad
always thought the best medicine was laughter - which I guess is
why several of us died of tuberculosis.
I read a brilliant book recently written by Journalist John
Pilger. It was called ''distant voices''. It's a compilation of
essays about various troubles throughout the world. Whenever you
read a good book it's like the author is right there, in the room,
talking to you - which is why I don't like to read good books.
After reading the book I thought, it's too bad you can't buy a
voodoo globe - so that you can make the earth spin really fast
and freak everybody out. I can picture in my mind a world without
war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that
world - because they'd never expect it. I hope that some day we'll
be able to put away our fears and prejudices - and just laugh at
people.
Wildlife and nature programs have always fascinated me. They let
you drift into this stream of consciousness, and at the same time
be enthralled by some of these animals and their habitats. How
long would any of us survive if we were stranded in a huge
national park in Africa? No time at all. A funny thing to do is
if you're in one of these parks and a friend gets bitten by a
poisonous snake, tell him you're going for help, then go about 10
feet and pretend that *you* got bitten by a snake. Then start an
argument with him about who's going to get help. A lot of guys
will start crying - that's why it makes you feel good when you
tell him it was just a joke. What happens though if your friend
is dead when you get back, and being eaten by vultures? I think
it's okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of the vultures
- to teach the vulture to do some tricks while you wait. But ONLY
if you're serious about adopting the vulture afterwards.
The Local Virtual Cartman Irritator Spoofer.
DOUGLAS GAA
Now in its fifteenth year, the Douglas G.A.A. Club Summer Festival has far exceeded the wildest dreams of its founders. It is now firmly established as the main social and sporting event of the greater Douglas area. And this year's festival promises to be one of the best yet, four days of hectic entertainment and activity sponsored by Beamish and Crawford. The highlight will probably be the appearance of "Gina and the Champions" on Sunday. Then again it could be "Jim McCann" on Monday or maybe it's the "Minor Hurling final" on Saturday night or it could be the "Inter-Committee Talent Competition" (sponsored by Pat O'Brien Meats) on Friday night. Whatever your favourite is, there is something there for you, whether it's the "Under Age" Tournament Final on Saturday afternoon or dancing to the "Musicmen" on Saturday night, the thing is to be there. Meet your friends and neighbours and maybe enjoy a jovial conversation over a pleasant drink in the relaxed atmosphere and comfortable surroundings of the well furnished bar. This is not just a festival; it is your festival. It is the festival of Douglas, organised by Douglas people for Douglas people and you have earned the right to be there and furthermore you are entitled to bring your friends and relations, even if they are not from Douglas. In fact everybody is invited, so get ready, get set, and enjoy. Treat yourself and your friends, you deserve it!
DOUBLE VICTORY FOR ST. FRANCIS COLLEGE
On Friday, May 5th 2000, students from St. Francis College,
Rochestown participated and were successful, in the Ringaskiddy
Youth Talent Festival.
They competed in two competitions U21 band competition, in which
they performed "Ballade Pour Adelane" and "in
Winter Skies" and recieved 90 marks, 5 marks more than their
nearest competitor for this they recieved the Pfizer Trophy.
The second competition was U21 choir in which they performed
"Do you hear the people sing?" and "The Rhythme Of
Life" and recieved 91 marks, the highest mark awarded in the
festival this year, for this they recieved the Credit Union
Perpetual Trophy. There was stiff opposition including last year's
winners, Nagle Rice Secondary School, Doneraile.
The teacher / accompanist and conductor on the day was Marion
Leen, who has been teaching in the school for three years.
The senior choir and orchestra hope that this is the beginning of
many successful outings and are already preparing for next year's
festival when they hope to retain their trophies.
Marriage of Eilis Foley and Conor Fox The marriage of Eilis Foley
and Conor Fox took place on May 19th at St. Joseph's Church,
Donoughmore. Conor is from Underwood, Rochestown. Eilis is from
Donoughmore, Co. Cork. Eilis is a teacher at St. Francis College,
Rochestown. The choir from the school sang at the wedding and
recieved high praise.
There will be a Summer Sale at St. Columba’s Girls School for Facility for the Deaf, held on Sunday 28th May from 3pm - 6pm. A fun-day for all with Face Painting, etc... Proceeds for the school.
The Grange/Frankfield Community Association are holding their AGM on Monday 29th May at 8pm in the Community Centre. All are welcome.
CIORCAL COMHRA
DOUGLAS LIBRARY
Next meeting in the Library on Friday May 26th
at 11.00 a m.
Ta failte roimh gach einne.
Art Exhibition
May23rd - May3lst Exhibition by members of the Adult Educational
Department of Douglas Community School.
LIFE IS ON THE MOVE
Life Pregnancy Care Service which has operated a Counselling
Service
for women in a Crisis Pregnancy at 77 Grand Parade, Cork, for the
past16 years is moving location. From June 1st their new Caring
Centre will operate from 123 Patrick Street, Cork. From this new
Caring Centre, Life Pregnancy Care Service will continue to
provide Free Pregnancy Jests, Confidential Counselling, Social
Welfare Advice, Legal and Medical Advice and Post-Abortion
Counselling. For an appointment telephone 021 4270445 or call in
person to 123 Patrick Street, Cork. The Centre is beside the
Motor Store and across the street from Merchants Quay' Shopping
Centre.
REGINA MUNDI INVESTIGATES
Regina Mundi College Students Investigate Facilities in Douglas For The physically challenged.
This project was to help people understand the physically
challenged better. It began when a physically challenged speaker
came to talk to 2 theta and explained to them how she copes with
her disability. They then decided to do a C.S.P.E (civic, social,
political education) action project on physically challenged
people. One of the class, who's sister attends the Lavanagh
Centre, organised a trip for the class to visit the centre. There
they visited the school and the adults' day-care centre. One
group of girls found out the allowances that a physically
challenged person received. Another group found out where
physically challenged people would buy their equipment and how
much it would cost. A group went to Cork airport, to see how well
it catered for disabled people. They interviewed a disabled
person on what they thought of the facilities on planes. They
also interviewed the duty officer.
Four girls went around Douglas in wheelchairs. They all found out
that it was difficult crossing roads and that most of the
footpaths were too high to get up on. The entrance to some shops
were too narrow and not accessible.
A group visited Maryborough House Hotel, Bully's and Rochestown
Park Hotel, to see how accessible they were and they interviewed
the managers. A group went to Douglas Village Shopping Centre and
another to Douglas Court Shopping Centre. They surveyed the
parking spaces allocated for disabled people to see how many able
bodied people use them. They gave surveys to shoppers to check
what they thought of the facilities for the physically challenged.
Girls visited local schools and graded them on how wheelchair
accessible they were. The survey was also carried out in Regina
Mundi College, and it transpired that the school is not wheel
chair friendly, as it has no lift and a disabled person couldn't
access the first floor.
One group was in charge of running some special awareness days
and a flyer competition in the school. The flyers were to
highlight the need for better facilities for the physically
challenged and it was to encourage people not to abuse the
facilities for the disabled. The school got prizes for the
competition from Douglas Books, Dunnes Stores, Tesco's, Boots and
Body Sense. The winners of the senior category were: Helen 0'Keeffe,
2nd Yvonne Coutt and 3rd Joyce Lynch and Linda Morgan. In the
junior category the winners were.. Nicola Santry, 2nd Amanda O'Keeffe
and 3rd Louise Kelleher.
The special awareness days were during Easter Week, where the
students informed the pupils in the whole school about their
finding's of their project and they held a special Easter service.
They invited Brian Crowley, MEP, to the school, but due to his
hectic schedule he could not attend.
