25th May, 2000
Notice Board


by Darragh McManus

With depressing predictability, racist "slogans" and abuse have begun to appear on strategic garage walls and street comers in this fair land of a thousand (qualified) welcomes. Oh! God. Of course they have. It makes perfect sense. The ones responsible for this are people. People are stupid. Hence, they are writing stupid things, QED. How could it be any other way? The other unsurprising aspect of the whole sad affair is the utter lack of any imagination or originality. The submorons have obviously decided to stick with the tried and tested: old favourites like "white power" or the charming "nigger's out" (don't they teach any punctuation in school anymore?), bookended with one or two stylish and eye-catching swastikas. "Well, you know, we wanted an image that people could identify with. Something familiar and well known. I mean, our product has been around for a very long time, and we wanted to convey to people our long-established traditions and commitment to excellence. So we chose the recurring swastika motif along with a catchy slogan in white spray-paint."
Surely there is some scope for improvement here. How about "I have no job so I'm going to take it out on the foreigners who I imagine have taken it"? No? Okay, then "What else is there to do on a Friday night?" Or maybe "Racism brings meaning to my life". This could actually be the root cause of all this trouble. Since the chaotic 90's, where the parameters of meaning have been shifted so far that they've become invisible, dressing up in a pointy hat and bonding with your fellow Teutons may be the only way to bring order and a sense of purpose. I am a bigot, therefore I am.
The funniest thing (and not in a ha ha kind of way) of all is that it's happening in Ireland. Forget the fact that there are millions of Irish immigrants scattered all over the place, or the pride we take in the cordial welcomes we extend to tourists and multinationals hungry for a tax-break. Forget even the fact that we are not Aryan supermen, and are not seen as such by... well, other Aryan supermen (I'm pretty sure Hitler lumped the Celts in the same evolutionary pile as the Ape-People of the Andes and homosexual communist).
No, we can delude ourselves and be hypocritical up to a point. But only a point. History doesn't lie, and facts don't either (except sometimes, when they do). And the fact remains that Ireland was colonised for over 700 years. That has to be some kind of world record. Before Europe decimated Africa, before Columbus "claimed" the Americas for the Queen of Spain, before the Renaissance, Reformation, invention of the printing press, Bubonic plague and the writing of Greensleeves, Ireland was under the authority of another people. Ireland was a colony before the term was even coined. "Okay, so we've got baronies, fiefdoms, counties and realms. But what the bloody hell do we call this Yrelande?" We are the world champions of being taken over and the Nobel laureates in getting our asses kicked. So maybe the next time the Irish Nazi Association are about to distribute leaflets arguing that "blacks are the scum of the British Empire", someone should take them aside and point out that, in fact, we are the scum of the British Empire - we spent longer under the cosh than all the blacks and Asians we now blame for our unemployment, confusion, lack of self-esteem, or whatever. Or maybe that person could point out that neither of us are "scum": that we were both victims of white greed and self-aggrandisement; that perhaps we should empathise with our fellow colonised instead of victimising them again; that two wrongs don't make a happy white.


What is Reflexology?
Reflexology is gentle pressure of the thumb over every part of the foot. It works on the principle that there are points on the foot that correspond to each and every structure and organ in the body so it is possible to pinpoint areas of the body that are not functioning to their full capacity, or have been affected by previous illnesses. Working these areas of the feet has been found to release blockages in the flow of energy present along the Reflexology zones in a person's body thus restoring the normal balance and allowing the body to heal itself.
What and where are these Zones?
Various Eastern Medical beliefs systemised the body into zones and meridians. Reflexology deals only with the longitudinal zones. There are 10 zones, five in each foot, which run horizontally up the body from the toes to the top of the head with the dividing line running between each toe. Energy flows along these lines and any disruption of the energy flow affects the organs and structures along the length of these zones.
Can Reflexology help me if I am already attending a doctor for a diagnosed condition?
All illnesses are caused by imbalances of some kind in the tissues of the body. Some of these are caused by bacteria/viruses. others by damage or injury to tissues. Chemical failure is caused by under, over or non-product ion of essential minerals/hormones necessary for normal body functions. This causes major stress in the body as it tries to heal itself. Reflexology helps combat stress and promotes healing by unblocking the disrupted energy flow along the zones. It does not interfere with the action of drugs such as antibiotics, anti
inflammatory agents painkillers etc. However there are certain conditions where Reflexology is not recommended. These are (a) Diabetes, (b) Anyone on major steroid medications. Those in the first trimester of Pregnancy. (d) Anyone with broken skin or infections of the foot including Athlete's foot.
From Marian Gray@ 087 6540696 - More next week


by Declan Cronin of Apex Clinic
Question: For the last nine months I've had pains in my abdomen. The pain can vary in intensity from severe to a slight kind of niggling discomfort. At times I can have pains in my shoulders similar to that of the flu and then again on other occasions I experience sever pain in the lower part of my back. When I'm in sever pain I sometimes feel nauseous and feel as if I'm about to faint. When I get an attack of this magnitude I find that the only thing I can do is to take to my bed until it has passed. These sever bouts of pain can last for anything up to five hours. I would like to know if you think that I might have Irritable Bowel Syndrome and could you advise me on what I should do. I'm twenty years of age and because of this I've had to give up my job.
Answer: From your letter it seems that you have not been diagnosed with having Irritable Bowel Syndrome by a medical doctor. and so the first thing you should do is contact your doctor and explain exactly what you've told me. Abdominal pain seems to be the most commonly reported symptom of Irritable Bowel Syndrome and is probably the main reason why people seek help. Reports and studies suggest that a slight majority of lBS sufferers can be in pain for three or four hours a day, and at times this could last form anything up to a month. You also state that you have given up your job. This can be common among suffers and in fact there are thousands of hours lost
each year in employment as a direct result of IBS. Within the next few months I'll be conducting a controlled pilot study of the positive effects psychotherapy can have on people who suffer from IBS. The costs of this study will be totally absorbed by the Apex clinic. If you wish to partake in this study you should contact me as soon as possible as there are only a few places left. You will need a letter from your doctor stating that you have been diagnosed with having Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
More next week.


Cllr. Deirdre Clune,T.D has called on the Minister for Enterprise, Trade and Employment to investigate the prices of Nintendo Products………Marriage of Convenience, a play by Ian Rowlands, described as "a marriage between a language and a region that had long since forgotten the sound of it's own past." can be seen at the Granary Theatre from Monday 29th May…. Popular ballad singer Jim McCann has released a new album called 'By Request'….the crew of naval vessel the LE Roisin has ' adopted' the Children's Unit at Cork University Hospital…..there's an open meeting at the Douglas Library on Thursday 8th of June from 6.00pm to 8.00pm for all those interested injoining the Open University……the Edith Wilkins Hope Foundation are holding a Gala Concert in Maryborough House Hotel on Wednesday 31st of May at 8.00pm tickets are available from Falveys or at the door.


A couple of weeks back 'Wusslife' stormed into the charts and brushed aside all in their path. The group was the brainchild of Louis Walsh and is managed by Ronan Teeting. Their new album is to be entitled, ''A fart in a fog'' and contains the No.1 smash-hit, ''baby the toast is burnt and I need some mind candy''. Two singles will be released from the album in early May, the eloquent, '' will it bleed if I pick it?'', and not forgetting the beautiful ballad, ''Who's taking the horse to France?'' The name of the album is reportedly inspired by the singing voice of Ronan Teeting, and some of the singing fraternity in Douglas G.A.A!! I could name them…..but I won't for fear of retribution.
It must be said that the amenities for children in Douglas Community Park, is now the envy of the city and beyond. I pass it daily and it's a paradise for the kids, and with the summer coming in it will again live up to its full potential. One thing kids love, is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my niece to McDonald's but instead I drove her to an old burnt -out warehouse. ''Oh no,'' I said. ''McDonald's burnt down''. She cried and cried, but I think deep down, she thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real McDonald's but it was getting pretty late - so I didn't bother.
It's also great to see that the trees don't seem to have been vandalised in the Community Park recently. I wonder, if trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? Hmmn…. We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.
The circus was in town again recently and I swore I'd go, but I never did. To me clowns aren't funny. In fact they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad. Dad always thought the best medicine was laughter - which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.
I read a brilliant book recently written by Journalist John Pilger. It was called ''distant voices''. It's a compilation of essays about various troubles throughout the world. Whenever you read a good book it's like the author is right there, in the room, talking to you - which is why I don't like to read good books. After reading the book I thought, it's too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe - so that you can make the earth spin really fast and freak everybody out. I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world - because they'd never expect it. I hope that some day we'll be able to put away our fears and prejudices - and just laugh at people.
Wildlife and nature programs have always fascinated me. They let you drift into this stream of consciousness, and at the same time be enthralled by some of these animals and their habitats. How long would any of us survive if we were stranded in a huge national park in Africa? No time at all. A funny thing to do is if you're in one of these parks and a friend gets bitten by a poisonous snake, tell him you're going for help, then go about 10 feet and pretend that *you* got bitten by a snake. Then start an argument with him about who's going to get help. A lot of guys will start crying - that's why it makes you feel good when you tell him it was just a joke. What happens though if your friend is dead when you get back, and being eaten by vultures? I think it's okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of the vultures - to teach the vulture to do some tricks while you wait. But ONLY if you're serious about adopting the vulture afterwards.
The Local Virtual Cartman Irritator Spoofer.


Now in its fifteenth year, the Douglas G.A.A. Club Summer Festival has far exceeded the wildest dreams of its founders. It is now firmly established as the main social and sporting event of the greater Douglas area. And this year's festival promises to be one of the best yet, four days of hectic entertainment and activity sponsored by Beamish and Crawford. The highlight will probably be the appearance of "Gina and the Champions" on Sunday. Then again it could be "Jim McCann" on Monday or maybe it's the "Minor Hurling final" on Saturday night or it could be the "Inter-Committee Talent Competition" (sponsored by Pat O'Brien Meats) on Friday night. Whatever your favourite is, there is something there for you, whether it's the "Under Age" Tournament Final on Saturday afternoon or dancing to the "Musicmen" on Saturday night, the thing is to be there. Meet your friends and neighbours and maybe enjoy a jovial conversation over a pleasant drink in the relaxed atmosphere and comfortable surroundings of the well furnished bar. This is not just a festival; it is your festival. It is the festival of Douglas, organised by Douglas people for Douglas people and you have earned the right to be there and furthermore you are entitled to bring your friends and relations, even if they are not from Douglas. In fact everybody is invited, so get ready, get set, and enjoy. Treat yourself and your friends, you deserve it!


On Friday, May 5th 2000, students from St. Francis College, Rochestown participated and were successful, in the Ringaskiddy Youth Talent Festival.
They competed in two competitions U21 band competition, in which they performed "Ballade Pour Adelane" and "in Winter Skies" and recieved 90 marks, 5 marks more than their nearest competitor for this they recieved the Pfizer Trophy.
The second competition was U21 choir in which they performed "Do you hear the people sing?" and "The Rhythme Of Life" and recieved 91 marks, the highest mark awarded in the festival this year, for this they recieved the Credit Union Perpetual Trophy. There was stiff opposition including last year's winners, Nagle Rice Secondary School, Doneraile.
The teacher / accompanist and conductor on the day was Marion Leen, who has been teaching in the school for three years.
The senior choir and orchestra hope that this is the beginning of many successful outings and are already preparing for next year's festival when they hope to retain their trophies.
Marriage of Eilis Foley and Conor Fox The marriage of Eilis Foley and Conor Fox took place on May 19th at St. Joseph's Church, Donoughmore. Conor is from Underwood, Rochestown. Eilis is from Donoughmore, Co. Cork. Eilis is a teacher at St. Francis College, Rochestown. The choir from the school sang at the wedding and recieved high praise.

There will be a Summer Sale at St. Columba’s Girls School for Facility for the Deaf, held on Sunday 28th May from 3pm - 6pm. A fun-day for all with Face Painting, etc... Proceeds for the school.

The Grange/Frankfield Community Association are holding their AGM on Monday 29th May at 8pm in the Community Centre. All are welcome.



Next meeting in the Library on Friday May 26th at 11.00 a m.
Ta failte roimh gach einne.
Art Exhibition
May23rd - May3lst Exhibition by members of the Adult Educational Department of Douglas Community School.


Life Pregnancy Care Service which has operated a Counselling Service
for women in a Crisis Pregnancy at 77 Grand Parade, Cork, for the past16 years is moving location. From June 1st their new Caring Centre will operate from 123 Patrick Street, Cork. From this new Caring Centre, Life Pregnancy Care Service will continue to provide Free Pregnancy Jests, Confidential Counselling, Social Welfare Advice, Legal and Medical Advice and Post-Abortion Counselling. For an appointment telephone 021 4270445 or call in person to 123 Patrick Street, Cork. The Centre is beside the Motor Store and across the street from Merchants Quay' Shopping Centre.


Regina Mundi College Students Investigate Facilities in Douglas For The physically challenged.

This project was to help people understand the physically challenged better. It began when a physically challenged speaker came to talk to 2 theta and explained to them how she copes with her disability. They then decided to do a C.S.P.E (civic, social, political education) action project on physically challenged people. One of the class, who's sister attends the Lavanagh Centre, organised a trip for the class to visit the centre. There they visited the school and the adults' day-care centre. One group of girls found out the allowances that a physically challenged person received. Another group found out where physically challenged people would buy their equipment and how much it would cost. A group went to Cork airport, to see how well it catered for disabled people. They interviewed a disabled person on what they thought of the facilities on planes. They also interviewed the duty officer.
Four girls went around Douglas in wheelchairs. They all found out that it was difficult crossing roads and that most of the footpaths were too high to get up on. The entrance to some shops were too narrow and not accessible.
A group visited Maryborough House Hotel, Bully's and Rochestown Park Hotel, to see how accessible they were and they interviewed the managers. A group went to Douglas Village Shopping Centre and another to Douglas Court Shopping Centre. They surveyed the parking spaces allocated for disabled people to see how many able bodied people use them. They gave surveys to shoppers to check what they thought of the facilities for the physically challenged.
Girls visited local schools and graded them on how wheelchair accessible they were. The survey was also carried out in Regina Mundi College, and it transpired that the school is not wheel chair friendly, as it has no lift and a disabled person couldn't access the first floor.
One group was in charge of running some special awareness days and a flyer competition in the school. The flyers were to highlight the need for better facilities for the physically challenged and it was to encourage people not to abuse the facilities for the disabled. The school got prizes for the competition from Douglas Books, Dunnes Stores, Tesco's, Boots and Body Sense. The winners of the senior category were: Helen 0'Keeffe, 2nd Yvonne Coutt and 3rd Joyce Lynch and Linda Morgan. In the junior category the winners were.. Nicola Santry, 2nd Amanda O'Keeffe and 3rd Louise Kelleher.
The special awareness days were during Easter Week, where the students informed the pupils in the whole school about their finding's of their project and they held a special Easter service. They invited Brian Crowley, MEP, to the school, but due to his hectic schedule he could not attend.

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