13th July, 2000
Notice Board


Lee Valley Golf & Country Club. Thursday 27th & Friday 28th July 00.
Ballinora GAA Club is growing rapidly and is constantly upgrading the facilities at the club.The recent purchase and development of grounds
at BALLYMAW~WATERFALL is an indication of the clubs commitment to providing first class facilities for its members and visitors. Ballinora Golf Classic is an important fundraiser for the club. This event has been highly successful in the past and it is expected that this year will be no exception. TIME SHEET: VINCENT DRINAN 021 4361536(w)/086 6793485. TEAM OF THREE 100.EARLY BOOKING ADVISED


Pilgrimmage to Knock next Sunday July 16th. There are a few seats left on the bus leaving Carrigaline at 6.30am, also collecting at City Hall car park.
Phone Aisling at 372035 or Mary at 371025


Beware of some Cheap & Nasty Toys

The French Consumer Security Commission warns about toys manufactured in China and currently available in Spain. The toys are 3.5cm figurines shaped as extra-terrestrials or small animals. When put in contact with water or liquid they rapidly swell to up to 6 times their size. The danger here is that even a small particle, when in contact with saliva, could cause choking or obstruction.


The European Union commissioners have announced that agreement has been reached to adopt English as the preferred language for European communications, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of negotiations, her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year phased plan for what will be known as EuroEnglish (Euro for short).
In the first year, "S" will be used instead of the soft "C. Sertainly, sivil servants will reseive this news with joy. Also, the hard "c" will be replased with "k". Not only will this klear up konfusion, but typewriters kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replased by "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20 per sent shorter.
In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always been a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of silent "e"s in the languag is disgrasful1 and they would go.
By the forth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" by "z" and "w" by "v", During ze fifz year ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trobis or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru.


During the War years 1939 - 45, the perception of many was, "Who were we neutral against?" It is a well known fact, according to G." Army intelligence of the time, that those living in the Southwest and West were very much Pro-German as it was not uncommon for U-boats to be seen close to the coast and being supplied with fish and other provisions, by local fishermen. For the record, a total of 256 aircraft of all nationalities crashed or forced landed in the Republic of Ireland during the war. Counties Cork and Kerry claimed twenty-one aircraft. Most of the aircraft that crashed here were been ferried from America in preparation for D-Day or were on Weather Missions or had been engaged by the enemy and crashed because of battle damage.
On August 20th 1940, the first aircraft to "Visit" in Kerry, crashed in Faha Mountain near Cloghane. The aircraft was a Focke Wulf 200 "Condor" of KG40 of the Luftwaffe. This was on a Met.Mission. Two of the six crew were injured and taken to St. Catherine's hospital, Tralee. The remaining crewmen were taken to Collins Barracks, Cork. The Curragh Interment Camp had not been built at this time. One rather unsure army officer in Cork later informed the Dept. of Defence in Dublin of the capture and politely requested further advice on whether they (the crew) should be released or shot. The reply that came back was "Detain them". The voice was of Eamonn De Valera.
The second German aircraft to "visit" Kerry was on Nov 25th 1940 when a Luftwaffe seaplane, a Blohm and Voss 138 ditched in the sea off the Blasket Islands. The crew of 4 survived and were interned.
The first fatalities took place on February 5th 1941 at Cashelane Hill, Dunbeacon near Durrus when a Focke Wulf 200 Condor of KG40 crashed in dense fog, killing 5 of 6 crew on board. The remaining crewman, although badly burned was taken to the burns unit of Mallow Hospital. The 5 bodies were laid in state in Bantry House where on February 6th 1941, the coffins were carried on army lorries of the second cyclist squadron to the abbey cemetery, Bantry. At the graveside, the Swastika flag covered the 5 coffins. (The flag is now on display in Collins Barracks Museum in Cork.
At the graveside, Her Thomson of the German legation in Dublin said, and I quote, "For the greater Reich and Fatherland, sleep thee well on foreign soil" unquote. Then after the Irish army accorded Military Honours, Herr Thomson gave the Hitler salute. Little is known of a Luftwaffe crash in Kenmare Bay Feb 23rd 1941 on April 17th 1941, another Focke Wulf 200 Condor of KG40 ditched in the sea off the West tip of Long Island near Schull. The crew of six survived and were interned.
August 26th 1941 saw the forced landing of a Luftwaffe Junker JU88 on Joe Coppingers farm in Belgooly. The crew of 4 were interned. This landing was unusual, in that the aircraft on a photographic mission over Liverpool was attacked by hurricanes in the "Irish Sea" and over the Old Head of Kinsale where it suffered severe engine damage. The aircraft made a wheels up landing, at Belgooly. Two of the crew when interned at the Curragh, were allowed out to study at Trinity College and before the war ended, both had become qualified Dentists.
Continued next week.


This weekend there will be no vacant seats at the Beer Garden in Turners Cross, so if you're heading in that direction make sure you go early. Not just to get a seat but to see and hear that very distinctive and popular entertainer - Robert Wright. No stranger to the Beer Garden, Robert's well defined good looks, energetic youthfulness and charming personality, not to mention his polished vocal versatility, have made him a household name amongst hundreds of patrons. Based in London, people sometimes get the impression that Robert is English. In fact nothing could be farther from the truth, as Robert explained in a recent interview with the Douglas Weekly.
Born in Dublin of unidentified parents, Robert was only about four months old when he was moved to Cork. What happened to him for the first three years of his life he is unsure, but he does know he was around four when he was sent to Lota. "I have a lot of happy memories of the school," says Robert. "They put me on the stage when I was a kid, it helped me a lot. Sometimes I look back and think I should have done this or done that, but it was really up to the teachers at the time. There was a very nice family in Douglas, called Cuthbert, who used to call to the school and take children out for a day. They seemed to like me and took me out a lot, and I soon felt as if I was part of their family.
"The sad part about growing up in Cork in the seventies was that you could never tell anybody that you went to Lota. I know dozens of guys who to this day never speak of Lota because people seem to look down on it. But it was no big deal it was just a school where we were put; we didn't have any choice. I have no complex about it. If I did I'd probably be on drugs or alcohol. "
There was a Brother who was sentenced to two or three years for abusing boys. I'd expect those boys to be angry, they have every right to be. At the same time I feel sorry for the Brother's, they shouldn't have been put in that position, they were entitled to get married. "
"I left the first job that the school gave me - an apprenticeship - I wasn't prepared to let them manipulate me for two years. So I went for a job with MNC on the South Douglas Road. Playing on his emotions, 'I don't have any parents' I told Mr. Collins who interviewed me. My background has never embarrassed me.
The one person who influenced me a lot is Tony Stevens; it's a shame about his accident. I used to work with Tony as a roadie. He is a good guy and a kind man and if I hadn't left Ireland in the early 80's I'd probably still be with him. But leaving Ireland was the best thing that ever happened to me .It helped me develop, to be positive, it made me a survivor It brought out whatever was in me that was waiting to come out"
Today Robert can sing anything. He has developed power and expanded his vocal range to such an extent that anything that can be done with a song, whether it's Rock'n'Roll, Funk, Soul, Jazz, Whatever? Robert Wright can do it. A master at his craft and a perfectionist by nature. He loves to sing in the Beer Garden as he has great respect for Liam O'Connell, the manager. "Liam has been absolutely fantastic to me," says Robert. Career wise he is now looking at the recording side of things. In the meantime we all have a chance to see him perform at the Beer Garden this Saturday & Sunday, don't miss it!
Next year, we in the Douglas Weekly, hope to see him perform at the Douglas Rose selection night.


Between holidays and good weather summer means eating out more often and credit cards can be a convenient way to pay. But be careful about handing over your credit card to restaurant or pub staff to settle a bill - it could cost you more than you bargained for. We are used to handing over our credit cards to pay restaurant bills. And, as is already happening in England and the US, we are likely to see a growing trend for pubs and clubs to ask customers to leave a card behind the bar to cover a bill or tab. If your credit card is used fraudulently (say, when it is swiped twice), you may lose your rights when you handed it over voluntarily. If your card is lost or stolen, you will usually he liable for up to 50 of any fraudulent spending done before you reported the loss or theft. However credit card companies do not necessarily have to reimburse you if your card details were not obtained through fraud, loss or theft. You should ideally not let your credit card out of your sight, even if it means accompanying staff to the desk to settle your bill. Watch the card being swiped, make sure the 'purchase total' section is filled in correctly and not left blank, then sign the slip immediately.


Church Road will be closed from Monday next July 17th to Friday July 21nd inclusive. We believe the reason for the closure is to facilitate the laying of Multi-Channel cables and the consequent resurfacing of the road. No doubt the alternative routes will be well signposted.


In response to a strongly worded letter from one of our readers in last week's issue we take advantage of the freedom of information act and print relevant excerpts from the minutes of the first two Council meetings at which the subject was first mentioned.


Present; Cllr. Braham Brennan (Chairman), Cllrs. D. Canty, P.
Desmond, B. O'Keeffe and S. Cotter.
In Attendance: Mr. B. McCutcheon, Senior Executive Planner
Mr. G. 0'Mahony, Development Officer
Ms. M. Walsh, Assistant Planner
Mr. N. Mulcahy, Executive Planner
Mr. M. Murphy, Executive Engineer

BAILEY'S LAND AT COONEY'S LANE - A number of Members circulated a proposal, which had been submitted to them involving the zoning of lands for housing and provision for amenity/recreational areas. It was agreed that Mr. Michael Murphy, Executive Engineer, would check the availability of services here with particular reference to disposal of foul sewage.


Present: Cllr. Braham Brennan (Chairman), Cllrs. B. O'Keeffe
S.Cotter, B. Cogan & D. Canty.

In Attendance Mr. B. McCutcheon, Senior Executive Planner
Mr. B. Archer, Senior Executive Planner
Mr. G. O'Mahony, Development Officer
Ms. M. Walsh, Assistant Planner
Mr. N. McDonnell, Assistant Planner
Mr. M. Murphy, Executive Engineer

BAILEY'S LANDS AT GRANGE - Members had circulated a proposal at the previous Meeting in relation to the zoning of these lands at Cooney's Lane. A number of Members stated that this development constituted infill and would not breach the 300 foot contour which had been regarded, during the course of the previous Development Plan, as the limit beyond which development should not take place into the green Belt.
Secondly, a substantial area was being provided for playing pitches. Cllr. Batt O'Keeffe recommended that the area involved be zoned subject to proper servicing and this was seconded by Cllr. Sylvester Cotter. The Council's Planners raised their concern about the intrusion of the proposal into the Green Belt and following further discussions, it was proposed by the Council's Planners and agreed that as the Northern part of the area proposed to be zoned was within the Development Boundary that this area alone could be zoned subject to appropriate density.
With respect to the question of the provision of lands for amenity/playing pitches it was noted that the lands earmarked on the plans submitted would involve a substantial amount of cut and fill and expenditure in the laying out of pitches. As a consequence, It was agreed that an area of level land, which could be accessed without going through existing housing estates, would be earmarked for amenity purposes in the context of the revised zoning.


Iarnrod Eireann asks intending passengers to contact the Special Helpline at 1-850-366222 for up to date Information. Iarnrod Eireann apologises to customers for the doubt and uncertainty the disruption has been causing,…… This year sees the First ever children's summer theatre Festival to be staged in Cork. Titled the 'New Children's Theatre festival' it will be the first time that such an event has occurred in this part of Ireland exclusively For young people. The idea and rationale For this new event is based on 4 years experience in developing summer children's theatre in Ireland. In that time there has been recognition that there is a lack of children's theatre in the southern region of Ireland especially during the long summer holidays. Shows nearly everyday during the month of August commencing with "Three Little Pigs" at the Triskel (1st - 12th), followed by "Pinocchio and the clowns from Outer Space"…Batt O'Keeffe T.D., M.C.C. tells us 7 dwellings at Horgans Buildings are to be refurbished also the fire service are to get two new fire engines.. Minister Michael Martin has made allocations for the upgrading /provision of new Health Centres at Carrigaline, Ballyphehane and St. Finbarrs…875,000 has been allocated to the Young Peoples Facilities and Services Fund at Knockneheeny, Togher and Mahon Community Centre's …Group Water Schemes are now eligible for grants of 155 per house ... 20,000 has been allocated towards a heat and power plant at the Leisureworld Complex in Bishopstown ... 45,000 has been allocated towards the development of a former landfill site for a park and ride facility in Cork City..


From the History of Douglas by Con Foley
(Continued from last week)
The Rev. George P. Quick was fond of writing poetry. He had his poems printed on cards, which he sent to his friends. The late Rector of Douglas, Canon H.J. Packham, kindly gave me an opportunity of copying some of the poems. Here are some extracts from three works.

"Dear are my friends of schoolboy days,
And dear are my old college chums,
Who have made their mark in the worlds highways
Or in work in city slums.

Dear are the hearts that seek God's Face
And touched with heavenly fire,
Are renewed and strengthened by His grace
'Neath the shade of our Douglas spire."

"When harsh words are spoken
Solemn vows are broken,
And love gives no token
God our Father knoweth."

"I love to turn with faith's keen eyes
From scenes so fair and bright as this
To the blest life beyond the skies -
A visit of entrancing bliss."

The report concludes with the following statistics: The church population is about 286, Dissenters 86. St. Luke's National School has about 50 children. Stipend of Rector 300. with a small augmentation from the 'Allen Bequest' of about 22. a year. There is an excellent Glebe House and offices built in 1875 by Canon Hayman, Cost about œ2,000. About four acres of glebe land. Rent œ12. P.a. and Board of Works charge of 55. p.a. A very fine organ costing 800 has lately been dedicated by the Bishop in Douglas Church, presented by the parishioners as a memorial to Queen Victoria. On the front is a beautiful gravure of the late Queen, around which is the inscription
'Victoria Reg: Britt: Imps: Ind: A.D. 1837-1901'."
There is one observation by the Rev. H.J. Cole (1903) which deserves special mention "The burial ground surrounding Douglas Church is now deserving of particular notice as it is one of the most beautiful and well kept in the South of Ireland."
In this burial ground against the south wall of the church lie the remains of the Cork poet, Milliken. There is an inscription on the altar tomb over his grave, which says:

While science, genius and wit shall be admired.
And merit, charity and worth beloved,
The memory of
Richard Alfred Milliken
Will not be forgotten.’

He died 16th December, 18l5. Milliken will best be remembered as the author of "The Groves of Blarney." It is an interesting fact that the Milliken family was also in the linen business. Stephenson's Diary records "Aug. 8, 1755, Proceeded to Castlemartyr through a populous Country and very capable of Improvement: there is a small Bleachyard
here, the Property of Robert Milliken." Milliken was himself born in
Castlemartyr. As well as being the author of "The Groves of Blarney," he also published "The Riverside," a poem, a volume of Miscellaneous
Poems, and a novel, "The Slave of Surinam" but his poem on Blarney is
the only one to survive. He practised as a lawyer in Cork and had a great love of the theatre. He was one of the founders of the Apollo Theatrical Society with Robert Besnard in 1805. Their purpose was to raise funds for charitable purposes in Cork. It was said, rather unkindly, that his talents lay more in the work of scene painting then in acting. He was also prominent in founding the Society of Arts.
To be concluded next week


Here are some more howlers that have turned up in exam papers;

16. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented removable type and the Bible. Another important invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking. And Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100 foot clipper.
17. The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies, and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter- Romeo and Juliet are an example of a heroic couplet. Romeo's last wish was to be laid by Juliet.
18. Writing at the same time as shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote paradise Regained.
19. During the Renaissance America began. Christopher Columbus was a great navigator who discovered America while cursing about the Atlantic.His ships were called the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Fe.
20. Later, the pilgrims crossed the ocean, and this was called Pilgrim's Progress. The winter of 1620 was a hard one for the settlers. Many people died and many babies were born. Captain John Smith was responsible for all this.


Leonardo da Vinci wrote in a notebook in 1485, "If a man is provided with a length of gummed linen cloth with a length of 12 yards on each side and 12 yards high. he can jump from any great height whatsoever without any injury." Alongside was his sketch of how such a cloth might look ( a pyramid shaped parachute). A few week ago, over Mpumalanga province in South Africa, British skydiver Adrian Nicholas was strapped into an exact replica of Leonardo's design, and lifted to 3 km by a hot air balloon. Parachutists and experts in aerodynamics had predicted that the canvas pyramid would fail. In the event, the 85-kg contraption worked remarkably well -floating so gently for 2.13km before Nicholas switched to a conventional parachute for the final drop that accompanying parachutists had to slow down to stay level. "It took one of the greatest minds who ever lived to design it," said Nicholas, "but it took 500 years to find a man with a brain small enough to actually go and fly it."

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