Selected Works Of Terry Jones

The Healthy Mole
By Terry Jones

He woke me that day,
I turned away,
I heard him say,
"Don't turn away,
hear what I have to say,
it might save you one day!"
He began,
"We are moles,
we dig holes,
we have souls,
we grow old."
I began to dig this funky mole,
I grabbed my bongos and got on a roll,
he continued,
"We live under the gound,
We are friendly, we are sound,
we are there where you want us to be found,
We are moles from underground."
I couldn't stop jamming with this funky rodent,
the rhymes he told were really potent,
he said,
"I have come to save you, man,
these rhymes will help you if they can,
it seems to me you're better than
all those dudes stuck in the can."
"What can I do?" I asked the guy,
"These rhymes you tell are really fly"
He told me,
"This rhyme I tell, gives you advice,
Don't wipe once, you must wipe twice,
you don't want your pants filled up with lice,
So take heed, sucka, of my advice!"
With that he disappeard,
and took the music from my ears,
my hands shook and I rubbed my beard,
my eyes began to fill with tears.
So I say to you before you grow old,
Rub twice not once, like you've been told,
Don't let your pants fill up with mould,
You better listen to The Healthy Mole

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