Letter to Tech Support
Dear Sirs:
Last year, I upgraded
Girlfriend 1 to Wife 1. I soon
noticed that the new
program began unexpected
child processing, which took up
a lot of space and
valuable resources. No mention of
this phenomenon
was included in the product
brochure.
In addition, Wife 1 installs itself into all
other
programs and launches during system
initialization,
where it monitors all other system
activity.
Applications such as Pokernight and Beerbash
no
longer run; the system crashes whenever those
programs are opened. I cannot seem to purge Wife 1
from my system. I am thinking about going back to
Girlfriend 1, but un-install does not work on this
program. Can you help me?
Sincerely,
Confused Husband
_______________________________________
Dear
Sir-
This is a very common problem that many men
complain about, but the confusion is mostly
due to a foundational misconception. Many men
upgrade from Girlfriend 1 to Wife 1 with the
idea
that Wife 1 is merely a utilities &
entertainment
program. Actually, Wife 1 is an
OPERATING SYSTEM and
designed by its creator
to run everything. It is
impossible to un-install,
delete, or purge the program
from the system once
installed. You cannot go back to
Girlfriend 1
because Wife 1 is not designed to do
this.
Some men have tried to install Girlfriend 2
or
Wife 2, but end up with more problems than
original system. Look in your manual under
"Warning: Alimony/ChildSupport." I recommend
you
keep Wife 1 and just deal with the
situation. Having
Wife 1 installed myself, I
might also suggest you read
the entire section
regarding General Protection Faults
(GPFs).
You must assume all responsibility for
faults
and problems that might occur. The best
course
of action is to push the apologize button,
then
the reset button, as soon as lock-up occurs.
System will run smoothly as long as you take
the blame for all GPFs. Wife 1 is a great program
but is very high maintenance.
Sincerely,
Tech Support