Dating and Domestic Violence Explained

Following are some concrete tools to help you understand dating and domestic violence. For a more in-depth treatment, including safety plans, and Break-up planning, please see the Dating Violence Prevention Guide at the back of the novel, The Breakable Vow. Be aware that while most victims are female, some are male. There are abusive females and they wreak the same havoc on the lives of their partners as male offenders. Additionally, gay lesbian violence or violence within same sex relationships is also a problem. The dynamics are the same. The only difference is that the victim in a same-sex relationship is likely to feel even more isolated, more fearful, will be less likely to seek help, and possibly will remain in the relationship longer because of a fear of exposure.

Please keep this information with you for as long as you are dating. Reread it periodically so it is fresh in your mind. Dating and domestic violence can happen to anyone. Don't let it happen to you.

One more thing worth mentioning is that many people fear that because they do not come from a perfect family, there is something wrong with them. This is nonsense. First of all, there are no perfect families. Secondly, you can be whatever you choose. If you witnessed or experienced violence in your family, you can be that much more determined to choose a healthy and non-violent partner. Don't let a tough childhood define you. Your future is up to you!

For more comprehensive information about dating and domestic violence, including Safety Planning, Break-Up Planning, Cycle of Violence, Questions to Ask About the New Person in Your Life, and much more, see the guidebook at the back of the novel, The Breakable Vow.