Swords Cycling Club

Why women shouldn't marry Cyclists

1. Their legs will be smoother than yours.
2. They are more likely to wash their bike than the car
3. Not even 'Super Domestiques' do dishes.
4. They will expect drinks handed up to them at 30mph during races (& even faster than that at home).
5. Wont go out on Saturday night coz they are racing on Sunday.
6. Too knackered to go out on Sunday.
7. You will be expected to understand 8/9 speed gears, 12/18/24/32 spoke wheels and the mystery of the Swords handicap system.
8. More likely to complement a fellow cyclist on his legs than to compliment you on yours.
9. They are always hungry/tired/ worried about their form.
10. May keep their favourite bike in the house, some even keep it in their bedroom and some women may not wish to share this space with something they are happy to ride for hours on end.
11. Will spend more on a pair of Oakleys than your birthday present.
12. Once they find a comfortable riding position, they are unwilling to change.
13. Always want to come first....usually after an 8 second sprint.
14. Will watch Eurosport for hours to watch it all coming down to sprint with Zabel winning again.
15. Drag you to Club get togethers where they will relive their fantasies with the fellow inflicted.
16. Buy loads of Cycling magazines which they never actually read.
17. They have more clingy numbers in their wardrobe than you do.
18. Spend hours on end stuck up some other cyclists arse!
19. May wish to go to Spain for a week 'to train'. (May even bring back photos to back up their story).
20. Are never happy with whatever they are currently riding.

Hugh Byrne