The Monks of the (Cork) Screws

John Philpott Curran, famous lawyer and member of the Hellfire Club in Dublin, founded a similar drinking club in Newmarket. They were called “The Monks of the (Cork) Screw”, and Philpott’s house near Lismire was called “Priory”. They had a poem about the club that my grandfather taught me.

When St. Patrick our Order invented,
He called us “The Monks of the Screw”.
Good rules to our Abbot presented,
To instruct us in what we should do.

“My children, be chaste till you’re tempted,
When sober, be wise and discreet,
And humble your bodies with fasting
Whene’er you have nothing to eat.

“And be not a glass in the convent
Save on a Festival found.
This rule, to enforce, I ordain it
A Festival all the year round.”

by Owen Bourke