The immense popularity of the Buffyverse, which, in terms of cultural influence, will be for this generation what "Star Trek" was for the last.
        - Jonah Goldberg, "Buffy and the Battle Against Evil"

Buffy the Vampire Slayer is a far more intelligent show than it really has any right to be.
        - Tim Lynch

Buffy virtually jumps off the screen with creativity and innovation. Never stagnant, it's creativity in constant motion. You just can't say that about many shows. The reason: Sarah Michelle Gellar. She's bitter and sexy and tough and smart and vulnerable, and nobody takes the pop-culture spewing lines of smart writers and makes them sound better.
        - Tim Goodman, picking Buffy as one of 1997's Top 10 Shows


Giles : "This world is older than any of you know. Contrary to popular mythology, it did not begin as a paradise. For untold eons, demons walked the Earth, and made it their home -- their Hell. But in time they lost their purchase on this reality, and the way was made for mortal animals, for Man. All that remains of the Old Ones are vestiges, certain magicks, certain creatures..."
Buffy : "And vampires."

Cordelia: "The Bronze. It's the only club worth going to around here. They let anybody in, but it's still the scene. It's in the bad part of town."
Buffy: "Where's that?"
Cordelia: "About half a block from the good part of town. We don't have a whole lot of town here."

Willow: "I thought Xander was gonna' show up."
Buffy: "Oh, are you guys going out?"
Willow: "No, we're just friends. We used to go out, but we broke up."
Buffy: "How come?"
Willow: "He stole my Barbie."
Buffy: "..."
Willow: "Oh, we were 5."
Buffy: "Oh."
Willow: "I don't actually date a whole lot...lately."
Buffy: "Why not?"
Willow: "Well, when I'm with a boy I like, it's hard for me to say anything cool or witty or at all. I can usually make a few vowel sounds, and then I have to go away."
Buffy: "It's not that bad."
Willow: "It is. I think boys are more interested in a girl who can talk."
Buffy: "You really haven't been dating lately."



Xander: "I laugh in the face of danger, and then I hide until it goes away."

Giles: "Why should someone want to harm Cordelia?"
Willow: "Maybe because they met her? Did I say that?"

Xander: "It's not what you think!"
Willow: "You like to look at the semi-nude engravings?"
Xander: "Oh, well, I guess it is what you think."



Buffy : "Do you know Miss Walsh, the teacher who's subbing for Mr. Gregory?"
Giles : "Yes...she's lovely, in a common, well-proportioned sort of way."



Giles: "Oh, Emily Dickinson."
Buffy: "We're both fans?"
Giles: "Yes, she's quite a good poet. I mean, for uh, a..."
Buffy: "A girl?"
Giles: "For an American."

Giles: "I had very definite plans about my future. I was going to be a fighter pilot. Or possibly a grocer."



Xander: "Why do I need to learn this?"
Willow: "'Cause otherwise you'll flunk math."
Xander: "Explain the part where that's bad."
Willow: "You remember. You fail math. You flunk out of school. You end up being the guy at the pizza place that sweeps the floor and says, 'Hey kids, where's the cool parties this weekend?' We've been through this."



Willow: "So, we're talking about a guy?"
Buffy: "Not exactly a guy. For us to have a conversation about a guy, there'd have to be a guy for us to have a conversation about. Was that a sentence?"

Buffy : "You want Xander, you've gotta speak up, girl!"
Willow : "No, no, no, no. No speaking up. That way leads to madness... and sweaty palms."



Buffy: "So, you've been seeing a guy, but you don't know what he looks like. Okay, this is a puzzle. No, wait, I'm good at these. Does it involve a midget and a block of ice?"

Willow : "What could a demon possibly want from me?"
Xander : "What's the square root of eight hundred and forty-one?"
Willow : "Twenty-nine. Oh, yeah."

Willow: "Malcolm. Moloch. Whatever he's called. The one boy that's really liked me and he's a demon robot. What does that say about me?"
Buffy: "Doesn't say anything about you."
Willow: "I mean, I thought I was really falling..."
Buffy: "Hey, did you forget? The one boy I've had the hots for since I moved here? Turned out to be a vampire."
Xander: "Right, and the teacher I had a crush on? Giant preying mantis." Willow: "That's true."
Xander: "That's life on the Hellmouth."
Buffy: "Let's face it. None of us are ever gonna' have a happy, normal relationship."
Xander: "We're doomed!"
Willow: "Yeah!" (laughs, then abrupt silence)



Cordelia: "Hello, dufus? You're in my light."
Xander: "Wendell, what is wrong with you? Don't you know that she is the center of the universe and the rest of us merely revolve around her?"



Xander: "Oh, hey, do you want to come to our place for dinner? Mom's making her famous phone call to the Chinese place."
Willow: "Xander, do you guys even have a stove?"



Xander: "You were looking at my neck."
Angel: "What?"
Xander: "You were checking out my neck, I saw that."
Angel: "No, I wasn't."
Xander: "Just keep your distance, pal."
Angel: "I wasn't looking at your neck."
Xander: "I told you to eat before we left."


He is bright, funny, and will one day be suave and handsome. Until that day arrives, he'll do the best he can with bright and funny.
        - from "Welcome to the Hellmouth" script, describing Xander

"We have asked TV3 not to run our ad while Buffy the Vampire Slayer is being aired as we feel it wouldnt be in good taste."
        - Funeral director Keith Massey on his firm's first Irish TV commercials

"You might be better off watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer on the other channel."
        - Pat Spillane, introducing a dour GAA game on RTE 2's "The Sunday Game"

>> Check Out The Buffy FAQ or a better Buffy Quotes Page

>> Return to Quotes index, or Site homepage.