"For anyone who is unsure about what is involved at an ordinary event, here are a few details:

Job Car parking

Skills required Arm-waving and pointing

Perks Trendy bibs to wear

Job Registration

Skills required Writing (not joined up)

Perks Get to sit in car and keep warm.

Job Start

Skills required Ability to blow whistle

Perks Red pens often left behind which you can keep

Job Finish

Skills required Ability to shout "NOW!" and operate a stapler

Perks People pleased to see you.

Job Checking results

Skills required Simple adding & subtracting

Perks Get to sit in car & keep warm

Job String course

Skills required Unravelling ball of string

Perks Get to eat sweeties intended for participants

See? It's easy! Anyone can do it, so please phone me without delay to reserve a slot on the job that best matches your skills. I had a dream recently that I didn't have to phone anyone and beg them to help, because lots of enthusiastic members had already rung me to offer their services."

Rona Molloy (Forth Valley Orienteers)

(This article stolen from Crossing Point, the NIOA newsletter, who stole it from Y Ddraig, magazine of the Welsh OA, who stole it from Score, magazine of the Scottish OA, who stole it from Forth Columnist, the newsletter of Forth Valley Orienteers!)