Thanks to Sam for Beta reading this, thanks also to Monica and Sarah for their suggestions re the title
February 14th 2001 - part 2
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Kerry smiles wryly. "I can only imagine what I looked like...screaming
at this man...beating him with my crutch. Then I heard Dave...calling
me." Her smile changes to a more wistful one. "He
didn't say 'Chief' or 'Dr Weaver'...he just said 'Kerry?' in a
small voice. I looked over at him...he was just standing there.
And...and I didn't think anything was wrong...and I was wondering
why he was just standing there...not doing anything to help...and
then I saw the blood. It didn't seem like much...just a trickle...you
could hardly see it against his jeans...at least from the front...the
point of entry. And as I watched, Dave just sort of 'folded up'
and slid to the ground...and I could see the blood pooling around
him."
Kerry takes a deep breath before continuing, "That's when I
screamed for help. A part of me was wondering why nobody had come
to check out the shot...but only a few seconds had passed...even
though it felt like forever."
-------------------
"So one minute I'm standing there trying to move forward and
help the Chief...but my legs won't work. It's like one of those
bad dreams where you're trying to run...but you can't. So I look
down...and there's a hole - just a small one - in my jeans...right
about here." Dave points to a spot on his left leg, midway
down the front of his thigh.
"And I'm thinking, 'no way man'...I can't have been shot...I
would have felt something...and then I notice the blood...and you
know all those cartoons where the cat gets his tail chopped off
or set on fire and he doesn't realize it until he sees it? Well
it was sort of like that...I mean the pain didn't really hit me
until I saw the blood.
Next thing I know, I'm sitting on the ground, looking at the
blood pouring out...and I know I should be doing something...I
know I should be applying pressure...trying to stop the bleeding...but
all I can do is look at it...watch as my life drains away...and
then I see a pair of hands...and they're on my leg and applying
pressure in the right place...and I look up...and it's Kerry...and
she looks at me...and I just know that I'm gonna be all right...I
know that the Chief won't let me die."
-------------------
"Dave was just sitting there, staring at his leg. I did my
best to try and control the bleeding, but all I had were my hands.
I was yelling at him, telling him to stay with me...not to let go...and
he was looking at me with a sort of a dazed expression. I guess
he was in shock...after all, it's not every day that some lunatic
tries to kill you..."
Kerry shakes her head, "Finally, after what seemed like
hours, I heard people coming to help...I said to Dave...I told
him he was going to be all right...that I wouldn't let him die...and
all I could think...all I could think about was last year...walking
into the room and seeing Carter...and Lucy." She looks away
for a few seconds before turning back to the camera.
"I suppose I should explain...Lucy and Carter...were a med
student and a resident in my ER. A year earlier, they'd been
attacked by a patient...stabbed. Carter survived, Lucy didn't. I
could hardly believe that it had happened again...and on
Valentine's Day again." She sighs. "Weird huh?"
"Anyway," she says, visibly composing herself. "The
next few minutes I was running on autopilot, ordering people to
help me get Dave onto a backboard and into Trauma one. Cleo...Dr
Finch - one of the residents - I told her to take care of the
other man...I told her to put him in four point restraints if he
had to, but I didn't want him getting loose. She...she said, that
she couldn't do that because I'd broken his arm. So I said to put
him in three point restraints." Kerry laughs as she says,
"I know it sounds funny now, but at the time I was serious.
And the look on Cleo's face..." She sighs at the memory.
"But no one was smiling then...except Dave. I had my hand on
his thigh, you know, to try and staunch the blood and I looked at
his face and he was smirking slightly and looking at where my
hands were, and I didn't know why he was smiling..."
------------------------
"It's crazy, I know," Dave says with a grin, "But
I could see Kerry's hands on me, and it suddenly occurred to me,
that she was almost touching my...you know..." He indicates
his crotch. "And it just seemed so funny at the time."
"Don't really remember much of the next few minutes,"
says Dave with a wry smile. "I remember cursing at Malik as
he was lifting me onto the backboard...and I remember hearing
Kerry yell at someone...but it all sort of went a bit blurry and
the next thing I remember clearly is staring at the ceiling of
Trauma one...and I hear Kerry saying to cut it off...and I'm
like, they gotta be kidding...it was only a flesh wound. So I try
to sit up and tell them no way are they gonna amputate." He
smiles ruefully. "Course they were talking about my jeans...Kerry
had told Lydia to cut them off me...and I'm relaxing a bit until
I see Lydia brandishing these scissors...and man they look
massive...and I'm freaking out cause they look so big...and I'm
thinking what if her hand slips when she gets...you know...up
near the important bits."
We hear a partially suppressed snort of laughter from behind the
camera. Dave sticks his tongue out at the sound before continuing.
"And I'm trying to tell them not to cut my jeans off and
Kerry's telling me to 'lie down and shut up dammit'. And I'm
starting to realize how serious things are getting...I can see
Chuny bringing in a whole armful of units of blood...and I
realize it's gonna be A positive...my type...and I close my eyes
thinking that things can't get much worse...and then I realize
they can...cause I hear Kerry saying to put in a foley."
------------------------
Kerry speaks as if reciting from a textbook; "A foley
catheter is standard procedure when dealing with a trauma patient...especially
one that is most likely going to require surgery. I knew this...I
knew it had to be done...but it didn't make it any easier to
order it..."
"It wasn't the first time I've heard a man scream as a foley
was inserted...and it wasn't the last...but somehow...somehow it
was the worst. I don't know if was because up to that point...up
till then, Dave had been holding up pretty well. I mean, I knew
he was in pain...he had to be with the amount of damage that the
bullet had done...but up till then he had been managing to
control it...when the foley went in...I couldn't look at him...I
saw him writhing in pain...and of course the movement didn't help
his leg...and I screamed at Chuny to find out what the hell was
keeping the surgeons...and when I looked at Dave again...he was
looking up at me...and I could see the pain in his eyes... ...and
I couldn't look at him...because I knew that I was responsible
for some of it...and I felt his hand in mine...and when I looked
at him he said... 'You okay Chief?'...and I couldn't believe it.
Here he was, in agony from a serious injury...and he's asking
<me> if I'm okay..." We can see Kerry's eyes filling
with tears. Looking away she gestures at the camera. "Shut...shut
that thing off...please..."
The screen fades to black.
----------------------
Dave is looking serious for a change as he speaks to the camera.
"I sort of lost it when the foley went in," he says.
"I mean, I know the bullet wound was hurting...but I'd sort
of managed to distance myself from it...told myself it wasn't
really happening...and it was working...but then, the pain of the
catheter." He shudders visibly. "That sort of brought
it all home. I knew that I wouldn't be getting one of those if it
wasn't serious...I...I'm not ashamed to admit that I screamed...and
then I couldn't control the pain...and I was losing it totally...and
then I saw Kerry standing there...and she looked so...so upset...but
yet she was holding herself together...and I knew I had to be
strong...for her sake..."
-------------------
Time has obviously passed since Kerry's last clip as she is
wearing a different top and is a lot more composed.
"Where were we?" she asks, looking off camera. We hear
the sound of a voice, but can't make out what it's saying. "Oh
right," says Kerry, "The trauma room."
Facing the camera, she says, "We'd managed to get Dave
stabilized...he was barely conscious, but his vital signs were
good. I thought that we'd done it...that maybe, just maybe things
were going to be all right."
"I watched as he was pushed into the elevator. I watched, as
the doors closed behind him and all I could think was that I
might never see him again. I...I knew that he stood a good chance
of coming through this...after all, if you're going to get shot,
what better place than in an ER...in front of the Chief of
Emergency Medicine..." There is a trace of bitterness in her
voice, but it's gone when she speaks again.
"I just felt so responsible...after all, if I hadn't jumped
in like that without thinking of the consequences...I should have
called security...that's what we pay them for...but no, I just
<had> to play the hero...but Dave was the one who paid the
price.
I kept thinking that maybe if I hadn't hit him just then...he
wouldn't have pulled the trigger...and Dave wouldn't be facing
emergency surgery."
We hear Dave's voice saying, "Kerry, if you hadn't been
there, I would've been a GSW to the chest at close range. You
know the survival rates for that are a hell of a lot worse than
for what happened to me." We can tell by the sound of his
voice that this is a conversation they've had before.
Kerry sighs and says, "I know that now...but back then...back
then, I wasn't exactly thinking clearly...especially after Romano
couldn't give me any guarantee that you'd keep your leg...or even
if you'd survive the operation."
There is silence from both of them, as the screen fades to black.
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To be continued