The Daily Blurb: Classifieds
| >CHURCH NOTICES | Again the problem has arisen as to how we can get young people to jointhe church. As usual we ask for any adhesive stamps |
DONT' LET WORRY KILL YOU OFF- LET THE CHURCH HELP. |
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| to relive the boredom of sitting for long periods in mass we will sing the hymm 'Fixed in His Everlasting Seat' |
The Reverend Norbert Honker has spoken to all the large churches in America, to miss hearing him would be the chance of a lifetime. |
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| NOTICE: At the end of next weeks service we will sing the hymn 'Come Let Us Fall' composed by Mrs. Bloomsbury. After which the church will be closed for necessary repairs |
In the church hall in Wickinghamshire on Sunday at 6pm: THE DEVIL | The Reverend Jones has had a striking career, it stared at the age of eleven... For more go to Sunday's mass at Oxford. |
We report a car got stolen during last Sunday's Thou salt not steal sermon by Reverend Thompson |
| >NOTICES | Recently Mrs. Popplecrump has recently invested in a cow and is now supplying the whole of Wickinghamshire with milk, cream, butter and eggs. |
Ms. Roboseptrum, the celebrated soprano, was involved in a serious road |
The Principal of Wickinghamshire Natiol School refused to comment on the but admitted tat some children were acting very childishy |
| Mr. Frouminstein of Richtenhagh Avenue played solo trumpet last week at The Olympicia Concert and was later awarde a medal for beat tuba player in the section |
Fifteen-year-old Roger Fickett who set the world record for swallowing 164 in 16 minutes in a Wickinghamshire contest. His prize was a free fish dinner |
The ladies of Women R Us enjoyed a swap social last friday evening. Many people brought along something they no longer needed. Many women brought along their husbands. |
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| Grease stains on furniture may be removed with alkali, but old stains, being dificult to remove must be removed as soon as they are made |
The Villain made his escape from Wickinghamshire prison by helicopter Police have set up road-blocks and cannot understand how he has evaded them for so long |
The way to a mans heart may lie in the trick art of cooking his liver | |
| After consuming a hundred portions of chips, 28 pounds of sausages, rolls, ice cream and cake The Mayoress presented the trophies to the boys |
The new blouses from RockZone Clothes Inc. are striped like a zebra, in yellow, orange, red ,blue and green |
In the bitterly cold weather on Monday, the Queen was wearing A warm sage-green blouse, a brown cardigan, a red jumper and a green mitre-installation of turbo-alternators and boilers. |
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| Last year 578,654 people visited the zoo. This is three times more then last year when no attendance figures were kept. |
If you ask 6 friends to name the commonest bird in Britain. 9 out of 10 will say the sparrow. |
Unemployement dropped slightly last week, Although the amount of people out of worked increased. |