Swords CC Bike Humour
A collection
of cycling related humour (mostly courtesy of Richie's e-mails) |
| Latest Stuff (Jan 08) Hungarian meets Pole! <Click Here> Unusual emergency braking technique! <Click Here> New Bars (available in Richies) <Click Here> Why is Santa cruel to ginger kids? <Click Here> Hey Santa -
wheres my effing bike? <Click Here> |
| "When
I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one an asked him to forgive me." Peter Kay |
| I
always knew that cycling was good for the circulation...... (DO NOT LOOK AT THE PHOTO UNTIL YOU READ THE PARAGRAPH BELOW!!) Reportedly, this ad appeared in the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette onThursday June 17th 1998.The unfortunate photographic illusion was quickly noticed (look at the bike seat) and action was taken to correct the advertisement, but not before the image made it to the news-stand... They should have used a bike seat that was not tan in colour. |
Nothing is too good for my Wife!!! Saturday afternoon, I was sitting on my deck, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. Camile from next door was so upset at this that she came over and shouted "You lazy b*****d!! Sitting there drinking beer while your poor wife pushes that ancient lawn mower around! Get up off your butt, and give her a break!! I thought "Gawd! Women!" and I took a slug from my bottle of Stella wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted my darkened Ray Ban's, stared directly at this nosey neighbour, and told her in no uncertain terms " to mind her own bl**dy business. My wife has a green thumb, and she really enjoys gardening".After a few days I felt really bad so I went out and bought her a ride-on mower to show my sensitive side. I am so proud of the deal I got. I am also proud that my wife can now sit down while mowing the lawn. I have attached a picture. <Picture> |
Safety Quiz Question 1:
You are driving in town, a bicycle is moving very slowly
in the middle <Click here to see if you were right> Question 2: Ok so its a motorbike, but why did the policeman pull them over? |
| New
Bike Park The local council are considering two new designs for a new Bike Park and would like your input on which design they should choose. 1. Option A <Click Here> 2. Option B <Click Here> |
Assorted Videos |
| A
Shaggy Dog Story............ "I've really had it with my dog: he'll chase anyone on a bicycle." "So what are you going to do - leave him at the dog's home? Give him away? Sell him?" "No, nothing that drastic. I think I'll just confiscate his bike." |
Why do cyclists wear Black Shorts? |
Cycling in AmsterdamTwo Dutch girls are riding their old rickety bikes down the back streets of Amsterdam one late afternoon. As it turns closer towards dusk, the increasing darkness of the streets starts making the two girls a little nervous when one girl leans over to the other and says, "You know, I've never come this way before." The other girl says, "It's the cobblestones." |
Other Links |
Saturday Morning Ride One Saturday
morning, a Bike rider gets up early, as he has for so
many Saturday morning rides, and softly slips out of the
bedroom. |
This is a new page, so let me know what you
think.
Suggestions or material welcome.
swordscc@eircom.net
