Proudstar Hall

 

 

"Well, what I didn't tell you is why your daddy and I weren't together when you where growing up. Remember when we discussed the birds and the bees because you heard of Jeremy's dad and his Uncle? Well, you father did something like that. And when I found out about it, I.....was....I....was....upset.... furious....and...deeply hurt. So I ran away. At the time...I didn't know about you...my only thought was to get away...I had loved Logan for so long...all my life it had seemed..and two weeks after we got married I found out he had a secret. Do you understand why I left?"

"Yes, Mommy."

Wolf only nodded.

"When I found out I was pregnant I was going to call him...I wanted him to know because I was so happy....but then I decided that he didn't have any right to you, you where mine to have forever..all he had contributed to it was his sperm...so I decided not to call him. I never told him he was a daddy. Tonight is the first time since we've been back that I've had to see him and I wasn't ready for him. Do you understand why I made the decision?"

When they nodded she smiled without it reaching her eyes.

"Good then let's get ready for bed. It's time and you have school tomorrow."

After she tucked them into bed she stepped out into the hall unsuprised to find Wolverine waiting on her.

"I've been expecting you to show up before this....Logan I'm tired..I really don't want to talk tonight."

Logan growled and grabbed her arms. "I jus' wanna know..are they really MINE?"

Jubilee nodded and pulled away from him.

"They have your sensitive ears...let's go into my room...or better yet downstairs. I don't want them to hear what I have to say to you."

As Jubilee led the way downstairs Wolf and Crissy crept out of bed and followed them. As they huddled together on the second floor landing watching their mother and their father as they argued in quiet tones. Suddenly their mother's voice raised in a way they had never heard before. Even with all the times she had be angry with them they had never heard the rage in her voice before.

"YOU WANT TO BLAME ME FOR NOT TELLING YOU? YOU CHEATED ON ME IN MY HOME! AND WITH THE MAN YOU HAD ADOPTED AS YOUR SON! YOU WANT ME TO TAKE THE BLAME! YOU HAD NO RIGHTS! HOW COULD I BE SURE YOU.."

At that point their mother's voice ended in mid-sentence. As they watched she ran up the stairs crying hysterically with all her hard won composure and maturity stripped from her by the one person who's approval had meant so much growing up.

They stood on the stairs and stared at the man who had made their Mommy cry again. As they stared down at him Logan stared back up in disbelief. Those two where his...and they looked so much like Jubilee....even as he watched they turned and walked up the stairs holding each others hands following their mother and walking into her room they laid down on either side of her stroking her hair and her back, whispering to her not to cry, they loved her, they would always be there for her, and that no matter what she would always be their mommy. Sitting up Jubilee gathered them into her arms sobbing into their hair as she rocked them gently. Whispering to them how much they meant to her she held them until they all feel asleep.

Logan stood in the doorway and watched them sleeping quietly the tear tracks down Jubilee's face hitting him as hard as when she'd been a child crying out of loneliness. Just then Wolf and Crissy opened their violet eyes and stared at him with hatred shining out of their eyes. Glaring at him they whispered knowing from things that Jubilee had said he could hear them, they spoke with the other finishing sentences.

"You made her cry again....we don't like you....you are mean.....go away and leave her....she doesn't need you...she's got us.....you do nothing but make her cry.....we love her...we don't love you....we hate you...She is our Mommy...and if you hurt her anymore....we'll have to hurt you."

With that they laid back beside her snuggling in her arms like little kittens finally falling asleep with her. The next morning Jubilee was up early making pancakes for the kids. As they got ready for school she told them she would pick them up again today for dance and judo classes. When she dropped them off they each kissed her cheek and ran up the stairs calling their good-byes. Smiling sadly she drove back to the Mansion and walked into her room to change clothes. Finding Logan sitting on her bed she glared at him.

"What do you want NOW? Didn't we say enough last night? Or do you want to discuss the reasons I left...by the way..How's Christian? Still happy with his choice and calling me a bitch for getting you first?"

Picking up her hairbrush she dragged it ruthlessly through her hair ignoring the pain it inflicted, braiding it quickly she grabbed her clothes and walked into Crissy's room to change. Walking into the danger room it was obvious that she was angry and upset. Scott tried to talk her out of running the sim but she wouldn't hear of it...she was going to do this, it was the first time she'd been in the danger room since she'd been back. As Scott watched she knelt and took deep breaths like a swimmer preparing to go underwater. When she stood and nodded to him, he started the Sim ready to turn it off at a moments notice. Four hours later the Sim ended and Jubilee stood there sweaty, exhausted, and breathing hard. Scott stared at her in admiration.

"I don't know what you've been doing for 10 years Jubilee...but you haven't lost any of your skills, and I think you've gained some. I know you've gained strength."

Jubilee nodded, "Judo and dance classes taught me a lot about control...and how to control my emotions to help control my powers. I hadn't lost my temper until last night in almost 8 years."

Checking the time she went into her room to shower and change before picking up the kids.

Walking downstairs she found Logan waiting on her.

"Wolverine, I really don't have time to fight with you right now. I've got to go and pick up the kids. We'll talk tonight after dinner."

With that she walked right by him going to the jeep and climbing in. Logan followed her and got in also.

"I want to meet them....other then sitting at a table not realizing their mine. I want to know their names and see their faces."

"We have classes Logan...you'll be doing a lot of sitting and watching. You will get bored."

"I'll chance it darlin'."

"Do what you want."

Then she started the Jeep and drove to the school. When she arrived she slammed the door with more force than necessary and stormed up the steps into the building. Realizing she was early she sat down to wait taking calming breaths and meditating. Soon the bell rang and children poured out of classrooms laughing and talking. Jubilee stood as she spotted Crissy and Wolf heading for her smiling at how they seemed to fit in so seamlessly. Leading the way out to the car she was suprised at the sudden hostility on their faces at the sight of Logan sitting there. "What's he doing HERE?" they asked in unison.

"He wants to get to know you...I told him we have classes but he wants to see you do them."

Urging them into the back-seat of the car she opened the driver's side door and headed for the Mall telling the children of the Dance class she had found and the Judo class that would accept them if they passed the examination.

"We're doing the dance first...I agreed to help teach...."

She smiled at the groans behind her.

"Did you think I was just going to shop while you danced? I'm going to help teach the dance classes and participate in the Judo classes...I already passed the test."

When they arrived Jubilee opened the trunk and waited as the children put up their bookbags and took out their gym bags. Still ignoring Logan they walked into the mall chatting vigorously. As he followed behind them watching their close interaction he felt almost jealous of the love they held for each other. Shaking off the emotions he sat and watched their classes comparing the Jubilee he had known to this new one, seeing the way she interacted with both parents and students. As the months passed they fell into a pattern of Logan attending classes and watching his children and ex-wife. The children made friends and would often leave with them to go to study or shop but they always made sure it was ok with Jubilee to leave. He watched their manners and the way they kept an eye on each other. But most of all he watched Jubilee as she flirted and talked with other men realizing what he had lost when he had given her up all those years ago.

One day he realized as he watched her move through Katas with the children that he had never stopped loving her as his wife...he had been scared of his emotions...and afraid of the love he bore her...and almost terrified of the responsibility that came as a husband...and had looked for the first way out, when Christian had made his offer he knew Jubilee would be home soon.

Christmas came and went with a happy celebration at the Mansion and Logan sitting at the house watching the festivities As each day passed he came to wonder if he had made a mistake so many years ago hiding his fears from himself...and from everyone else also. New Year's Eve he crouched in a tree and watched as Jubilee went out for the night looking beautiful in an evening gown.

That Valentine's Day 3 dozen red roses arrived without a card attached. Jubilee placed them in Vases around the mansion trying to figure out who could have sent them. A few weeks later Jubilee called Logan and asked him to take the children to classes, she wasn't feeling well and wanted to talk to Hank. Logan accepted this chance to spend some time with them even knowing it would not be easy to get them to accept him for they had shown they didn't care for him at all.

Back at the Mansion Jubilee put the phone down with a slight sigh for her deception...she really wasn't feeling well but it would not be fixed anytime in the future. She had tried so hard to keep from interfering with Logan's relationship with the children..and now she had to because time was running out for her...and it didn't look like he could do it himself..he had made very little progress in persuading the children to trust him.

Rubbing her head she cursed once again the inoperable tumor that had been growing in her mind for the past two years. A secret only Sharron had known about, the reason why she had tried so hard to get Jubilee to come back. Laying down she took a nap waking up only when the children slammed into their rooms.

With a sigh she picked up the phone and called Logan, asking him to come to the Mansion and join them for dinner because she need to talk to him, then she went to the children's bedrooms and told them her decision. At the indignant outcry she raised her hand and informed them she had given them plenty of time to adjust to being around Logan and that she was tired of waiting for them to give him a fair chance and now they where going to live with him that weekend...she would always be there for them...but she was no longer going to allow things to continue as they had been. When Logan arrived for dinner he found the children sullen and quiet and thought it was because he had come to eat with them until he heard the reason why Jubilee wanted to talk to him.

"I ain't a parent!"

"You are too! They are as much your children as they are mine! And I'm tired of waiting for you to realize that and start acting like you have an interest in their future! I want you to start acting like you are their father! Not like a stranger that has no say in their future! You might like to deny what you are Logan...but I will not see them suffer and feel like you don't care enough to be there for them."

"I never said I didn' care! I only said that~"

"I know what you SAID Logan! And I'm telling you what is going to be...I've raised them for 10 years...you can take them for a month!"

Then she seemed to collapse into a chair.

"Logan please just...trust me...I know what I'm doing...you need to get to know them...they will only be children for a short time. And this may be the only way to get them to accept you as their father before it's too late."

"All right Darlin' I'll take them..when do I take them?"

"This Friday we'll move their clothes and things into bedrooms at the house."

Jubilee stood and walked out almost running to her room where she took two of the painkillers that only seemed to work for short periods of time. She knew her time was drawing shorter and shorter...but wanted to be sure her children the greatest achievement of her life where happy. That Friday when she moved them into the house with Logan's help he kept looking at her funny.

"Ya look tired Jubes..."

"I'm fine Logan. Don't worry about me."

Even as she said these words she rubbed her forehead in pain.

"Jubes...ya know you can talk to me 'bout anything.."

"I know Logan...but this is just a headache."

After they moved the children into their bedroom Jubilee hugged and kissed them, whispering, "Be good Kids for me...and remember...no matter what! Mommy Love's you more than anything."

When she left with Scott she stood in the Jeep and waved until they where completely out of sight, then she turned around and sat down with tears streaming down her cheeks. Scott looked at her. "Jubilee...perhaps we should tell them.."

Jubilee shook her head crying too hard to speak, even to tell him that she felt it was best that they not know she had been prepared for this and not prepared them...letting them think it was sudden and quick since she would not be coming out of the hospital this time...the tumor was growing too quickly and destroying her motor functions.

Three weeks later Jean and Scott where surprised by a late night call from Crissy sobbing because she had a dream in which her mother had come in and sat on her bed, kissed her forehead and told her good-bye before disappearing. When they found out that Wolf had been dreaming the same thing they hung up and called the hospital finding out that Jubilee had died only hours before. With a shared look they got up and dressed driving to the little house to find everyone up and the children sobbing in each others arms, with Logan standing by helpless to comfort them.

Sitting down and taking them into their separate arms, They started to tell them what had happened three days before Jubilee sent the to Logan to live.

Jubilee came to me and told me that she had been diagnosed with a tumor she wanted to be sure the children would be happy with the X-men before she agreed to have it looked at. She wanted to be sure that they would fit in here because she remembered the pain of growing up without a family to lean on. She was only supposed to go in for tests to see if it was operable, but apparently it grew too quickly and in the wrong place and she passed away at the same time you both dreamed she said good-bye."

Logan turned away so they couldn't see the tears in his eyes as he thought of the things dream Jubilee had said to him. He knew the promise he had made to her to always care for the children and not hold their past against them would be easy because their past was his fault and he would spend the rest of his life trying to make it up to them for missing the first ten years of their lives.

Logan stood in front of Jubilee's grave and placed a dozen red roses on it and stood up, stepping back he watched as the children placed their white and yellow roses before placing a hand on their shoulders and walking back to the house with them. Over the years as the Children grew into adults and fine Mutants he often returned to her grave to talk to her...always placing flowers on her grave telling her how they where growing up and how very much he missed her. One day he came and gave her the news they where getting married to Mutant twins on the same day. Then he came with news that she was a grandmother and the two sets of twins had been born on the same day at the same time.

Chrissy looked around on Christmas... "Has anyone seen Grandpa?" She asked the three sets of twins in the family room watching TV. Julie shook her head.

"No Mom, he said he was going to visit grandma...and he went outside."

Chrissy smiled at her 12 year old daughter, thinking that she looked more and more like her namesake every day. Walking over to the closet she pulled out her coat and started to put it on. Wolf instantly came running in to see what was going on because the children had been forbidden to go outside in the storm. When she explained to him what was wrong he grabbed his coat and walked with her.

When they reached Jubilee's grave they weren't really suprised to find Logan lying on top of it looking peaceful and serene. They both knew he was dead before they touched him because they didn't hear his heart beating even faintly.

Three days later they buried him there by her side and placed a matching headstone that read, "With all our Misunderstandings...and all of our fights...the only place we belonged...was together side by side".

Taking Chrissy's hand Wolf walked back to their families with her as they talked about all the happy times they had growing up.

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2212 A. D.

"Grandma! Grandma! Come and see what I found..."

Julie looked up smiling at the little live wire she claimed as her great-grandchild.

"What is it?"

"I found something...come and see!"

Taking her arm Christian pulled her out into a small clearing in the woods to a headstone.

"See grandma? What's it doing out here? Why are they buried together? Who where they?!"

Julie laughed and reached out to touch the stone believing she was imaging the warmth in it as she told her grandson the story of HER grandparents. Weaving the tale of love, betrayal and happy endings.

The Legend Continues.............