Bujinkan Wexford Dojo
the mc dojo files:
some funny and not so funny
stuff to come out of different martial art's clubs and organisations
from around the world
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Guide to Martial Arts Doublespeak
Author : unkown ?
When people say..
Japanese martial arts are the best
They really mean...
I practice a Japanese martial art
When people say..
This art is thousands of years old
They really mean...
This style is decades old.
When people say..
The martial arts are about
building better people.
They really mean...
The martial arts are about sweat, bruises and money.
When people say..
Chinese martial arts are
the best.
They really mean...
I practice a Chinese martial art.
When people say..
High kicks are stupid.
They really mean...
I can't do high kicks.
When people say..
Sparring is extremely important.
They really mean...
I'm good at fighting and I like it and
I can't do much of anything else.
When people say..
The martial arts are about building better people.
They really mean...
The martial arts are about
beating people up if they lay a finger on you.
When people say..
Korean martial arts are the best.
They really mean...
I practice a Korean martial art.
When people say..
Breaking techniques are very
important.
They really mean...
We do a lot of breaking techniques.
When people say..
I don't believe in grades.
They really mean...
Nobody ever gave me a high grade.
When people say..
The martial arts are about
building better evolved
characters.
They really mean...
Like me.
When people say..
Filipino martial arts are the
best.
They really mean...
I practice a Filipino martial art.
When people say..
Sophisticated arts like Tai Chi
and Aikido are far superior.
They really mean...
Sparring frightens me.
When people say..
He's a good martial arts teacher.
They really mean...
He's in my organization.
When people say..
He's a lousy martial arts teacher.
They really mean...
He used to be in my
organization but he broke
away and I don't get any
money out of him anymore.
When people say..
My style is the best.
They really mean...
I don't know anything about
any other styles.
When people say..
Grades are not important.
They really mean...
There's a grading coming up
and it's important.
When people say..
Breaking techniques are useless.
They really mean...
I can't do breaking techniques.
When people say..
I'm an innovative, free-
thinking, modern Western martial
arts teacher, doing my own non-
classical thing.
They really mean...
I'm more interested in teaching than learning;
and the Orientals ignore me because they know how ignorant I am.
When people say..
Martial arts politics are the
necessary result of official
recognition by respectable
associations to protect the public
They really mean...
I belong to a large, well-established organization.
When people say..
I hate martial arts politics.
They really mean...
None of the large, well-
established organizations
recognize me or have the
slightest interest in my
existence.
When people say..
In this system, we make the art
fit the person.
They really mean...
In this system, we make the person fit the art.
When people say..
Competitions are a waste of time.
They really mean...
I never won any competitions.
When people say..
Forms or kata are the highest
expression of the inner essence
of the martial arts.
They really mean...
I read that somewhere -- andI've had enough of tournaments.
When people say..
Forms or kata are useless.
They really mean...
Bruce Lee said forms are
useless and this relieves me of
a lot of effort, so go argue
with him.
When people say..
One style is not better than
another -- it's the individual
that counts.
They really mean...
Don't go to another school -- it's the style we teach here that counts.
When people say..
The techniques aren't important.
They really mean...
The techniques are important.
When people say..
The principles are important.
They really mean...
I wouldn't know what else to
do with the principles so it's
the techniques that are
important.
When people say..
Bruce Lee didn't know what
he was talking about.
They really mean...
I don't know what Bruce Lee was talking about.
When people say..
Size and strength are not important.
They really mean...
Size and strength are
important, especially if
you're fighting somebody
who's bigger and stronger
than you are.
When people say..
Science and leverage will always win out over bruce force.
They really mean...
Except when he's bigger and
stronger than you are.
When people say..
The purpose of the martial arts is spiritual development and liberation from the ego.
They really mean...
I'm so humble and wise, it's
terrific.