Brian's story
DRUNK IN BERLIN
18-19th February -->(4th weekend in Berlin)
Friday night,(The buildup to a night of terror) came home excited about tonight, myself and Eoin went and bought a soccer ball and went for an old kick around. That was grand, came home and it was time to buy alcohol. Eventually i bought 2 cans of black shite and between Eddie and myself we bought a bottle of Scotch-Whiskey. Came home and tucked into the first shot of it and declared that it was great, then cooked a massive feed all while drinking. Finished the dinner, and drank some more. Eddie said that he poured me a treble but i cant vouch for that. Then we left heading towards the Dubliner (Myself,Eddy,Eoin and Thomas). I have no idea what time we arrived at the Dubliner but we went upstairs and continued drinking again, (normal stuff -just Carlsberg). The rest of the night is a bit blurry, but i remember that at some point we were downstairs and we met a big crowd of Germans that were from BlackForest(???) and were absolutely dead on. Their German wasn't very good and at one point i stood up and said in a loud voice to Marcus (on the Germans) "YOURE A BIG BOLAX", everyone started laughing while he said was kuhl (or maybe he was actually trying to say cool) . Anyway, i met one of the girls there (I thought she was alright but then again i thought that it was 11.30 and it was really 2.15. They left early enough and i was able finally (4th weekend) to be with someone from German (All i remember it was short,boring and blurry!). Anyway the night ended with a desperate search for a nite club that ended up in a sand fight with the subsequent running and screaming involved.
Saturday night ( a night of pure terror!!). The night began innocently enough --> there was no rushing and thoughts of finally going to a proper disco were floating through our minds. At first we thought that it would be a good idea to not drink all of the scotch whiskey but as usual once we had a few glasses it was finished. Things were still on track, now i would take things slowly, the night was young. We went to the Dubliner, once again , we started slowly, innocently (1 glass of carlsberg pilsner) then we just as we were leaving Eddy decided that Jagermeister (50% alcohol blue lethal shite served in a tiny glass) would be a good wake-up call so we had two (or at least i had 2 and a half --> i spilled one of them). Things were beggining to go pear-shaped and co-ordination wasn't the best. I went to the toilet in a shop doorway at some point, as we were now in some place where there was a lot of good niteclubs (apparently!), eventually after a lot of struggling (at least on my part) we made it to a pub where we met some Americans (I was really drunk at this time because i was talking to one and i have no idea what i was saying --> anyway there was drinking of Murphy Red and Jagermeister (YES THE SMALL BLUE SHITE AGAIN!!!) and all of us including the Americans went to this niteclub which was full of 16 - 18 year olds. The rest of the nite is a blur except for three things, nearly getting killed on the stairs on several occasions (there was 2 stories), feeling so tired and all i wanted to do was go home , and then finally getting sick (not just sick, sick but violently sick). My night was filled with going to the toilet getting sick, falling asleep, waking up getting sick on the nite club floor, going to the toilet to go to sleep and getting sick again. I don't remember coming home at all except that we were late for the bus and myself and Eddy were the only ones on it (Dont exactly know how they left me on a bus in that state) --> anyways lets just say that my stomach is still in bits and i was very sick (not actually vomiting (close though) but just feeling very sick.
MORAL OF THIS WEEKEND: "Never drink alcohol out of really small glasses, no matter how nice it tastes"
If god had meant us to drink alcohol like this he would have made:
1. The alcohol a lower percentage (so you wouldn't get pissed)
2. The glasses bigger (so you wouldn't drink them in one go)
3. Taste more like tequila (so you wouldn't drink so many of them)
4. And finally they would be more expensive ( so when you are drunk, it does NOT make financial sense!)
Next Weekend: I shall not drink alcohol ("or at least not Jagermeister and whiskey again"), so I can remember everything that goes on.
ALGORITHM FOR THE WEEKEND:
JAGERMEISTER == LETHAL SHITE
IF DRINK <= 1 JAGERMEISTER THEN
PERSON == GRAND
ELSE IF DRINK > 1 JAGERMEISTER THEN
PERSON != GRAND
PERSON == SICK
PERSON == VOMITING
PERSON == SPEAK("I WONT DRINK THIS SHITE AGAIN")
PERSON != ABLE TO GET UP FOR WORK MONDAY MORNING()
PERSON >= FUCKED UP FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK()
END IF
END IF
TUNE IN NEXT WEEKEND : Will i be able to allure the temptations of drink, the chinking of glasses, the smiles of the drunk, the sweet tintilating taste of alcohol................Or once again will it be "DRUNK IN BERLIN".
Email Brain at bdoody@yahoo.com
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