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Goodbye, So Long.

by Jeanne M.


Usual: Not Mine. I wish. All recognizable characters belong to their owners. The song "Within You" belongs to David Bowie. It's set about 8 years in the future. Written in response to a dare- combine Jono, David Bowie, and Jubilee. *Grr* You know who you are. I don't like Husk. Paige Guthrie fans, don't kill me. Please, feedback. Onwards!

Song Lyrics


How you've turned my world,
you precious thing,
your starve and near exhaust me,
everything I've done,
I've done for you

Dearest Paige,

Why? What is it that drove you towards me in the beginning? You drew me in like a moth to a flame, your sunshine both fascinated and repulsed me. Yer so damn beautiful. So pure, so untouchable. Beyond my reach. At least, that's what you wanted me to think. Tell me, gel. Was it some dark, morbid fantasy that intrigued you, caused you to play these games? Me against him, him against me. Two damned souls fighting for the same angelic princess. Is that what you wanted? Only he pretended he wasn't damned, he honestly thought that he was your knight in shining armor.

I move the stars for no one,

I could only do so much. How could I compete with him? And when we found out about his grandfather, and what that old bastard did...... I couldn't believe you stayed with him. Especially after he blamed poor Jubes for taking the sod away. That gel. Somedays, I think the world has it in for her just as much as me. Did you know that we're engaged? No, I didn't think you did. Yeah, the first member of Gen X. to extend towards me her hand. My sparkler. Just as dark and scared as me in her own way, only she never succumbed to her demons. I love her. I lusted after you, I love her.

you've run so long,
you've run so far,
your eyes can be so cruel,
just as I can be so cruel,

I. Never. Loved. You. Once, I thought I did. It's easy to mistake infatuation with love. With your wholesome country goodness and your winning smile, you were nothing more than a shallow flirt. A cheap, sad, jealous girl. You were jealous of your brother for being a mutant first, you were jealous of Monet and Ev for being more powerful and having more control, you were jealous of Jubilee being a former X-Man, you were jealous whenever something would take attention away from you. I know what Miss Frost said to you that day when you were watching Penny and me. Surprised? I know a lot. More than anyone gives me credit for. I know that yer leaving tonight, yer going to Genosha.

though I do believe in you......
yes I do......

I'm sure you can do whatever you set your mind to. The only time you ever failed at anything was you lost the position of team leader. Oh, the one thing ya wanted most. The reason you lost was because you wanted it so badly. You wanted the title, the power, and you lost to two people who didn't really want it, but had what it took to keep us alive. You lost to me and Jubes. Bet that had to smart. But this job that the Genosha government is offering you, it's a good one. You can make a difference there, I know it. What kind of difference is up to you.

can't live without the sunlight,
can't love without your heartbeat,
I.....I can't live within you

So, tonight I sit before the fireplace, just thinking. Letting the last happy memories of us go. I know someday we'll meet up again, unfortunately I have a feeling that it will be on the opposite sides of a battlefield. We both thought once that someday we could work it out. But I couldn't live my life trailing after you forever, lost in your eyes. I have more pride than that. I watched you go from a shallow girl into a strong woman. Frost would be so proud of you. I go my way now, and you go yours. I'll pretend to be surprised when you don't show up to the welcoming party for Amiko. What is it with Wolverine's gels all joining superteams? That kid is something else, the way she picks fights...... reminds me a lot o her 'dad'.

I can't live within you.

Later Paige. I got things to do. Make sure me gel is sleeping soundly. I wouldn't want her to go on one of her famous insomniac wanderings and find you leaving. That could get messy. I let you go, now do the same for me. For all of us.