The Guide To Being Dumped
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Hello all of you singles. Is life getting you down? Have you been getting
depressed because there is simply not enough girls to go around? And
girls, are you tired of the boys being too afraid to ask you out?
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Well here it is, the answer to everyone's deepest wish! Here it is "The
Guide to Being Dumped." Every week I 'll take the top 10 dumping lies
and I'll translate their true meanings for all of you. Now here they are,
this weeks top 10 lies, and what they really mean.
#1 "I'm not ready for that type of commitment"
Translation: "I don't want to date you; however, you can take me
out to dinner and a movie every once and a while. Just don't hang
around me so much that you scare away the guy's I really want to date."
#2 "God doesn't want me to date right now."
Translation: (There are two.) "I don't know why I said yes in the first
place" / "God doesn't want me to date someone as ugly as you right now."
#3 "I only date older men/ women."
Translation: "I only date men/ women whom have more money than you do."
#4 "You just are not my type."
Translation: "When I look at you, and think of kissing you I want to vomit."
#5 "You're too good for me."
Translation: "I'm too good for you."
#6 "We're too close of friends" / "Your too much like a brother."
Translation: "I like you but you just don't turn me on."
#7 "You'll always have a special place in my heart"
Translation: "My lawyer will contact you soon about the restraining order."
#8 "I think we should date other people."
Translation: "Look, I'm late for my date, he's probably out waiting in
the parking lot, I've got to go."
#9 "I just don't have the time to date anyone."
Translation: "You do realize that I've been avoiding you all semester."
#10 "Maybe next semester"
Translation: "Not even if you were the last man on Earth."
If you have anymore and you want to have them viewed by all, do e-mail them to email@example.com!